December 2010, Make Way!

December was a month full of strange creatures, strange snowmen, and goofy cats! We shot a commercial and had a bit of par-tay-ing, for all to see!
` It's also a new year and this post is finally ready, despite being too sick to write for a couple days! I'll begin with an adorable picture of Rusty licking my face:

December 1, 2010:

Today, Rusty wasn't sleeping as he usually does when we're doing karate, but instead standing straight beneath me, swatting at my belt! We had to lock him in the bedroom with Vada, where she was sleeping.
` For a while, we heard Rusty cry frantically, and then it stopped. When I opened the bedroom door, Vada was sitting straight up with a troubled look on her face, and the room reeked of kitten diarrhea -- but at least Rusty had picked a good place, on the instruction manual for my calculator.
` Though I had wanted to read the Spanish side again, I was glad, at least, that it didn't get anywhere else! Poor Vada!!!

I knew I shouldn't have let him drink that milk -- I just didn't count on him being away from his litter box when it hit him!


December 2, 2010:

No more karate for Lucas! He's all sad now because he can't do any kind of activity at all until next Tuesday. Also, my school bag smells -- I hope it's not from Rusty.
` Vada seems to be taking it in stride, though, and trying to eat his kitten food as usual....

Rusty's getting to be just as wide as Vada! She's also tolerating him even more, especially when she's asleep!

December 6, 2010:

Found mysterious Christmas presents, from someone named Vicki -- they look old, and Lucas doesn't think that's Troy's mom's name.

Later: Troy informed us that Vicki is actually is his mom's name and the presents didn't get distributed in 2008 because of the snowstorm preventing everyone from coming together, and then got put in storage.

In RustyNews:

Can you just let me out? This kitten is driving me nuts!

Get offa me! I'm try'na sleep up here!

More coffee table highjinks!

Rusty's also a Pit-Licker, just the way Violet used to be!

Rusty playing fetch! Good boy!

December 18, 2010:

Today, Lucas and I did a Commercial Shoot for Hearos ear plugs, my first brand of ear plugs, though I had to stop using them because they were too expensive. I don't remember how well they worked, but according to this biker guy, and this earplug-needing guy, they're not bad, in the scheme of things.
` Accidentally, Lucas got me up at 6:30 in the morning, two hours before we needed to leave instead of one, but at least I was be awake-enough to help him navigate to the giant filmmaker's mansion.

I remember when Lucas and I and those other talented freaks tried to get a filmmaker's mansion together, but the mansion and all the talented freaks fell through, and we wound up moving into Crazy Ghetto Queen's Condemned House of Certain Doom.
` Me-mories...

This mansion had this painting that I swear I've seen a picture of on the internet, it's Hugmore -- and he's been shot! They also have a popcorn machine....

In putting on his first costume, Lucas managed to split the gladiator pants, so they put a loincloth-thing on the back of them. It looks good, though!

In putting on my first costume, I needed a bit of help because they involve both a mask and clumsy gloves. That's me -- Dr. Orang U. Tan!

We started shooting downstairs, and the craft services chef was actually cooking in the kitchen scene, and I think he's in the final take, probably out back, grilling up some burgers.
` Amazingly, I found a veggie-burger and it was delicious!
` After lunch, I went upstairs and donned climbing gear, and joined in a game of Twister, but finally, they had me go outside onto the balcony and act like I had just climbed up!

So, you're probably wondering, how does the commercial go, exactly? Here's the storyline, accompanied by rehearsal photos:

Moses comes out of his bedroom to find clinking belly-dancers and guys wearing turbans in the hallway...

...comes through the door to find people juggling and tossing psychadelic beach balls, is blocked from going around the bar by the people playing Twister, so he climbs over it and the camera turns, we can see the band playing, the Voyeur Dead zombie chicks, a guy in a rabbit suit, a unicyclist, and Lucas in a gorilla suit doing his nunchuk thing.

Out the window, you can see me climbing over the balcony...

Then, Moses goes into a corner room, and in the next scene he goes down the spiral staircase into the foyer

...where there are several people dancing in synchrony, other people dressed as elves and presents, singing 'I want a hippopotamus for Christmas', one of the Team Awesome crew SCUBA diving in the enormous swimming pool-like fountain, which has a window in the side, with a toy double-rotor helicoptor flying around.

Then, he goes into the hallway where firefighters (one of them had brought the unicycle and the climbing gear) were chasing some smoke with a hose, then there was a room with a real DJ with a fake set-up -- or at least it wasn't plugged in -- and a six-inch mohawk, surrounded by a guy in a penguin suit, a girl wearing a Snuggie (the stupid blanket with sleeves) and a luchador mask dancing with an excited dog, me as Dr. Orang U. Tan, and a few others with crazy costumes.
` Somehow, I didn't get a picture of the scene I was in, but it was almost as scary as this other Hugmore painting:

Then Moses stops at the door to the kitchen, the camera cuts away, and then he puts in the earplugs.

We get a close-up on his face as he sighs with relief, then he continues while I come through the door, make like I haven't seen the banana playing the guitar in for ever, while space aliens and such dance outside the windows, then Lucas dressed as the ripped-pants gladiator fighting a be-furred guy with a battle-axe, some odd poker players (the teddy bear was winning!) and an S&M couple.

And, for what it's worth, Moses says the Hearos worked so well that he couldn't hear the director yell "Cut!"

It's all a brightly-colored blur now... anyway, it was a lot of hard work, somehow, and we wound up very tired. In any case, I am so jealous of the people who live at that mansion. Even their bathrooms are amazing. Here's the downstairs bathroom door:

This bathroom has a Hugmore:

ALL the bathrooms have a bidet!

It's almost like they don't even have to wipe their own asses! That would also explain the utter lack of toilet paper in the entire house... either that, or they had just hidden it from all the people so it didn't get used up... or else is all got used up by the people here already!
` So tired!


December 19, 2010:

I had been so tired from yesterday, but it was so cold in my bedroom that I couldn't fall asleep, and for some reason, Rusty wasn't trying to keep me warm. I had just seen the heater fan downstairs and knew it must be keeping the house warm. Except I was wrong about that.
` At 2 in the morning, Lucas got up to find the entire house very refrigerator-like. It was in the den, which was about 80 degrees. He turned on the light to find Anthony and his girlfriend sleeping in that room with a girl, with Rusty on his head!
` Apparently Joel had moved the heater into there and then didn't take it back out. I'm surprised at him because the heater fan was in the same place as the fireplace fan -- he should have known it was for keeping the house warm.
` And then, when I got up in the morning, Anthony teased me for having 'Gotten Up Late Hair' because I had been tossing and turning from the lack of the heat he had been enjoying.

Well, better luck tonight getting to sleep early.


December 20, 2010:

My grandma called, and she's depressed because most of the family has moved away, and she needs help taking care of Vic, who she has to feed through a tube. Sucks for both of them.
` I tried to cheer her up by telling her about the commercial shoot, but she said, "I don't care to hear about that cra -- uh, crazy stuff." So, I called my mom and told her and she was thrilled! At least someone wants to hear about it!


December 21, 2010:

The package my mom sent came, and with $100! I took some of the money and after Lucas' eye appointment, used some of it to buy a Christmas tree and put the presents under it!

In other news, Vada and Rusty seem to be friends, and I've trained Rusty to go up into the kitchen window (and not the counter!) to watch me wash dishes. I've been finishing unfinished tasks and keeping the house clean like a mofo!

Lucas has always impressed everyone at UPS, especially the way he gets down in shiko dachi to sort boxes and is very careful. But yesterday at work, he figured out that not only has his eye injury cost him $2,500 in income, which is a bit more than a month's rent here, but is going to cost him his job!
` So, today he proved himself to all the supervisors etc. by going around and revving out all the bins!

December 22, 2010:

Lucas went all around the warehouse today cleaning house, and the supervisors were so impressed that when his supervisor told him to come in at 3:30 tomorrow, another one said, "No, make it 1:30!"
` Yay! Two extra hours!

Also today, our neighbor Dean, who had come over to our house before, brought some wine, including wine by Francis Ford Coppola (the director of the Godfather movies, etc.).


December 23, 2010:

Today at UPS, Lucas loaded a truck all neat and orderly-like, which had had 27 misloads the day before, and the driver actually shook Lucas' hand and said "thanks, that's beautiful!"
` One of the safety ladies was passing out union schedulers and Lucas, a member of the union, asked for one and said, "Sorry, these are only for permanents." Lucas said, "I was hired as a permanent!"
` That was when he learned that the supervisors can't prevent him from getting laid off, so he found the biggest mucky-muk in the whole warehouse and told her he'd like to not get laid off, and that he'd been doing such a good job that the sups have been sending him all around to help everyone else, and that he could also offer body kinesiology and video services, such as instructional videos. She thanked him for working so hard so far.
` His sup, Derrick, was standing right there, and we can hope the exchanged words. Now, all the supervisors have to do is tell Karen they want Lucas to satay and she knows who he is.

Also, Sarah and Barb got us a Christmas Dinner!

Gossip:

We stopped at Nina's McDonald's and she says that her sister Sarah has had another baby a month ago, but won't tell who the father is. Lucas was astonished, and told her that exactly ten months ago, we'd heard Stinky Johnny behind closed doors with Sarah, which is his cousin by marriage....
` INCEST!!!! Kind of. That poor girl has no respect for herself!

Also, at the gym the other day, I ran into John 'Galoot', Charolotte's friend, who told me that Char and Brad were living at Char's mom's house and have a baby boy named Loden, and are much more calmed down than they used to be.
` I wonder how long that will last?


December 24, 2010:

Lucas greatly outperformed this reformed and crabby crack whore at work today by doing an excellent job of loading two trucks!
` Par-tay over here with Dan and Melissa, Dan of Doom and his girl, and, when I became too drunk, I went away to watch my Netflix DVD -- season 1 of Bullshit.


December 25, 2010:

Prezzents! Including re-gifts from Troy's mom! (Shhhh!) One of them was this Mickey Mouse Christmas ornament with Mickey and Goofy on a little train going around a Christmas tree, with Donald in pursuit, and it plays a little tune.
` Yeah.
` My mom got everyone some blueberry jam, Jeep hats and stockings and she got me a couple shirts. Lucas says, "How does it look?"

Tom, being a Burkhardt brewer, must have been behind this one:

She also got the dogs and cats toys... Rusty's already broken his:

He also is greatly thrilled with the wrapping paper, so I don't think he's disappointed! I also sent my gramma these postcards:

Lucas prepared the turkey teriyaki-style, which Rusty was enjoying -- wait, here comes Vada!

December 29, 2010:

Lucas still has his job, but since there's so little work, he's stuck at home. So, today, he made a bunch of snowmen! The ones with arms and legs are playing bocce, while the others are relegated to watching.

I couldn't join him because I was too sick to do anything, so I just lazed around and slept occasionally when I could get warm enough. I didn't even blog or anything because I was in so much pain and discomfort and exhaustion my brain couldn't work.
` Meanwhile, Troy played video games. I mean, like, all day. Like, eight hours! Then, while Lucas went out at night to add more to the snow scene, he was still playing video games! Yeah, he doesn't drink or do drugs, but I think this is just as bad!
` Lucas was so tired that he fell asleep on the couch and wouldn't even wake up when I had told him his beer had thawed!


December 30, 2010:

Lucas finally woke up at about four in the morning and found the house nice and toasty. Amazingly, Troy -- who was still downstairs playing video games -- had stoked the fire! Way to go, Troy!
` Unfortunately, he had wound up burning two whole bins of wood, so we were almost out again. So, today we went out and got more wood, and there was no new wood in the dumpster -- and then this guy came out with a forklift and used it to smash some wood racks or whatever they are, and Lucas broke those in half!

Then, another snowman pulled up a chair to watch the bocce, but was in danger of turning partly yellow!

Then, we went to the bank because now is the first time ever that we can qualify to refinance my car -- except then we found out that I can never qualify to refinance my car because it's seven years old!
` Apparently, there are no companies that will refinance cars older than five years, no matter if the car's in great condition with a new clutch and its resale value has bottomed out. My car may be ideal for refinancing, but rules are rules and no one can break them! WHY, GOD, WHYYYYY!?

Oh well, at least I got a pretty picture of the sunset through the neighbor's house:




December 31, 2010:

Got my Financial Aid check for winter quarter! Yayyyyyy! It was over $2,000! That's how much they like me!
` Also, since Christmas I'd been trying to get Lucas to watch the first couple episodes of Penn & Teller: Bullshit (the comedian-tricksters of Vegas expose scams and trick people with fake scams of their own) because I thought he'd really like it.
` Each day, he said he would watch it, so I didn't drop it in the mailbox so that we could get our next DVD. But he just didn't and wasted our literally valuable $$ DVD-time!
` Finally, this morning he just told me that he hated TV shows except for sports and that he didn't really want to watch it at all. Then why the hell did he keep saying he would? He could have already watched his next DVD and I could have had my second by now if he'd just been honest to begin with!

After that, we had some morning fiascos -- frozen coffee spilled on the carport wall, Joel and the dogs tearing up the flower garden and breaking a snowman, and the front door knob not working anymore -- and then went on our errands -- yay for the check!
` I would have liked to have been writing blog posts and such, but that was finally when Mike decided to get out of bed and take Lucas' truck to his shop.
` Since he had previously driven Lucas' truck 80mph on the highway (something Lucas has never done) Lucas insisted that Mike lead him in his truck and me in my car to his shop. Little had we suspected, this wound up being a two-hour trip!

So, all that took a huge chunk out of my day. Then, on the way back home, Lucas' co-worker at UPS/co-carpooler called, and we picked them up.
` We hung out with them for a bit, then had to do some stuff -- Lucas had to work on collecting some unemployment, and I needed to ride the exercise bike in my office because the gym was closed and my tummy hurted from sitting still all day. At about 7:30 they left, saying they would walk home. Whatever!
` Lucas and I should have gone to Troy's New Year's bash at AFK (Away From Keyboard), a new gaming bar a stone's throw away from the crackhouse Lucas and I used to go to, in the building that used to be Bogey's and then Cherry Blossom sushi.

Instead, we were losers, stayed at home, fell asleep, got up in time to pop the cork at midnight, and there were barely any fireworks! It was so disappointing!

Only Andrew was there for a few moments, and then he was bored with it. Have we forgotten how to have fun?


January 1, 2011:

At about 2:30 in the morning, there were children here, one of them was playing video games with Joel really loudly and I had to get up and ask him to turn it down. Turns out that Anthony crashed out here with his kids because he was too drunk to drive home last night.
` I woke up to the sound of Lucas and the kids strumming and drumming downstairs, although Rusty tried to keep me in bed as usual by using tongue-fu on my nose! He's like my personal Biore strip, that kitten!

I spent all morning playing and whiteboard drawing some, having some fun and whatnot. We even had cake! My favorite -- 2011-flavored!

The kids also tried to knock down Lucas' snowmen, but by now, Lucas had reinforced them so much that they were solid ice! The kids just bounced off!

Lucas is telling me to come check out the sunset -- I'll have that picture up here in my January 2011 Flickr album soon.
` Also, there are tons of good pictures I didn't have room for in this post, including ones that are of things I never mentioned -- you can see them here in my December 2010 album.

See you next time!

Production Photos from the 2010 award-winning 48 Hour film, Sex A-Peel

I have much more to blog about in my own life, but first... as if I haven't blabbed about this enough, I have photos from the making of Sex A-Peel, taken by Renee Scougale.
` Lucas told me to upload them on Flickr so now he can show all his friends and business associates, and that also means that you, too, can see a closeup of this:

Also, you can see him plowing over the shopping cart with the old lady stunt-double!

And tossing the rich guy out of his Lamborghini!

Not to mention, fly through the air with an orange stuffed in his mouth!

Actually, he's pretending to materialize in front of this guy:

And for having such nice lens-boobies, he's gonna blow his brains out... wearing kneepads! You know, so he doesn't hurt himself.

That and more are all here in their own Flickr Photo Set! I hope I didn't, um, you know, infringe on any copyrights by doing this!

Lucas is now the famous 'dancing janitor!' SWEET!

Check it out!!!! The video with my fiance Lucas as the Dancing Janitor has gone viral -- here it is once again:



How viral is it? Well, it's mentioned in the title of a local website TechFlash article, about the Microsoft contest, and a few other places....

I may as well continue with my journal entries, as well, considering something really weird happened the day after my last post:


May 10, 2010:

At six in the morning, Lucas woke me up, asking me if I'd ever heard of Geni-Value. A short time later, he came back up, saying that our bank account had been drained, plus an overdraft charge, in the wee hours of the morning, from this Geni-Value, which turns out to facilitate monetary exchange with pornography websites, and that the entire history on his MacPro had been deleted.

Evidently, someone was up late last night and used Lucas' computer to buy porn with our bank account!

When I came home from school, Lucas had gone to the bank and determined that someone had taken the new debit card he had been sent in the mail. And, since it couldn't have in a million years been Troy, and it also couldn't have been Rick, especially since I could hear him loudly snoring as usual in the wee hours of the morning, then that leaves Trouble Boy, Andrew.

Later...

Lucas called Andrew's dad over and they talked about this whole thing... apparently, he really, really didn't do it. This has been a bad day for him, considering that he realizes now just how much Lacy the meth chick was using him now that she's been kicked out of the house.

Later yet...

Lucas' new debit card came in the mail after all! So, where did the new card number come from? According to the lady at the bank, someone used Lucas' identity and ordered another debit card and activated it -- just to buy porn?

As far as the computer history goes, that was Rick's doing, because he himself was banking online last night and didn't want his information to be saved on Lucas' computer.

So, the thing with the computer is just a coincidence -- this is why I don't like jumping to conclusions!


May 11, 2010:

The Debit Card Drama continues, as I study for yet another Spanish test. Apparently, the lady at the bank made a mistake -- there was no new debit card number being used after all. What really happened was that someone has stolen Lucas' debit card number.

Who? Nobody at the bank can tell. We did have the police involved, but they can't do anything either.

In other news, Lucas has been growing his beard out again for the next episode of Hump City.

In yet more news... there's been a few more sub-plots going on that I never mentioned. For example, just as we were having difficulty with Lacy the homeless meth chick that was playing Andrew like a fiddle (and made him pawn off all his stuff), Troy brought by a much nicer homeless non-meth chick for a few days.

That would be Jen -- but the night she made us dinner was also the night she was moving into her new house, so she's not homeless anymore.
` By itself, this is not remarkable, but it was also at this time that a female relative of Rick's was just getting out of jail (she had gotten into jail because she fled the police) and she didn't have a place to stay.

So, we could have had three homeless chicks living at our house at the same time! But we didn't.

Pues, vamo estudiar ahora! Chau!

There have been ups and downs, and now where am I?

The good news is, we've got Johnny out of the house. The bad news is, he left owing us $900 and we aren't able to make rent.

But I'm getting ahead of myself! Let me start from where I left off last time!

January 26, 2010:

I'm at the library now, and Morgan is talking about how his dad is a lesbian. Cool! "On the one hand, it's kind of weird," he said, "but on the other hand I can see how this would be the case."

Later on, we were discussing some of the transparent propaganda techniques used in the movie Expelled (not to mention the fact that all the scientists were lied to as to what they were being interviewed for!), when Lucas finally shows up from his trip to Value Village with the burned-out rock and roll guy. (Sans the burned-out rock and roll guy, who apparently lives in a cardboard box or something.)
` He actually changed into his skimpy stage costume for Saturday! It was quite exciting and I got some pictures!

At Denny's now... Alex handed me the rest of her strawberry milkshake to me and said, "Orgasm's on me!"
` Mmmm banana split! (No milkshakes necessary!)

According to Laura, your cell phone sucks if it doesn't have a tip calculator!


January 28, 2010:

Turns out that not only are Random the filmmaker and Mark the Jack Sparrow going to be at Lucas' concert, but they know each other!

By the way, did I mention that the other day I got pulled over for my headlight, just after it burned out, and it was one of the same cops who came over when Brad called the cops on us -- and Char before that! I told her how glad I was to have those two out!


January 29, 2010:

Johnny said that he was going to be here all day to practice for the show tomorrow, and he wasn't at all! This is the fifth time in a row he's gotten out of rehearsing! On top of that, his brother Joe drove all the way up this way to pick Johnny up on the corner and Johnny wasn't there, so Joe came up to the house to call around looking for him!
` Michael, at least, was able to come over and help Lucas with the internet. Also, Troy has moved some more of his stuff in. Oh, and Lucas' hair experiments have been amusing.


January 30, 2010 -- day of the music video concert!

I woke up to Johnny refusing to pay bills. Though Violet was under my blanket, lying with her head on my shoulder, I made myself get up.
` As usual, Johnny is making accusations in order to get out of paying bills: "You're double-charging me on Comcast!"
` For what? The $14 phone line, which I've been paying for, just so he has a phone? It's not like anyone else uses it -- we have our own phones, thanks!

Johnny's amazingly bitter about not getting paid for the concert, which is going to be filmed and shown on the internet, because we have to pay Random for the filmmaker and Heidi the sound girl, for their work! So, instead of helping Lucas set up for the show, he's going on some expedition for his car.
` Sue, another person who is filming the concert, isn't complaining about not being paid, and Random, though he is at least being paid a hundred dollars for the hour (a quarter of his normal rate) has not complained about working for Lucas without pay in the past.
` Anyway, I went out into the living room amid all this, and Johnny stopped arguing.

Just after eleven a.m., I was cleaning the kitchen floor and the doorbell rang four times rapidly. It was... SIDESHOW, that guy from the ghetto who hates Lucas and me! Oh my Dog! Do ALL the ghetto rats know where we live?
` He was here with his tow truck, going to tow Johnny's car, but Johnny isn't here! Again! Just like yesterday with Joe!

You know, when Johnny says one thing and does another, thus pissing someone off, his excuse is "Those are just words." He doesn't seem to realize that words are supposed to be used more strongly than just half-assed! Seriously.

P.S. By 5:00 p.m. I managed to photograph all of my really old drawings I brought with me from my mom's house, dating back to when I was only 5 years old, so I'm hoping to put those up online with the concert photos from tonight!


January 31, 2010 -- one in the morning!

Ahhh... tasty, Kool-Aid flavored shower steam wafting through the bedroom! For unsweetened strawberry Kool-Aid is one of the ingredients used in Lucas' hair dye.
` His outfit was a scream -- button-up boxer shorts, knee socks, bead necklaces, transparent shirt -- as was his neon orange double-mohawk with red Kool-Aid as well as blue highlights that ran down face as he sweated, along with red and black lipstick, black starburst lines around his eyes, and white fingernail polish.
` To offset his flamboyantness was the other half of the Lou Ryan band (but not for long!) Johnny, on drums, wearing a very nice suit. Belonged to his dad.
` Larry and Cowboy Steve's house really did look like a bar, and that's where most of the people flocked to as they came in. I was watching The Green Mile on the TVs, but by about 8:30 or so there were so many people that I couldn't hear it anymore.

Mark the Jack Sparrow, unfortunately, was up late filming this movie with Brendan Frasier or whoever it was, or some other project, I forget, so he couldn't show up.
` However, there was this cool guy named Dan who kinda reminded me of Mark, but without the hair. Supposedly, he's Johnny's friend, but he seems to cool for that.
` He was saying how much he loved Lucas and wanted to have sex with him, while his girlfriend rolled her eyes. Which reminds me, Dan said that I was the first person he told that he had bought her an engagement ring but hours before! (Luckily I doubt she will read this, so his secret's still safe with me!)

Anyway, the camera persons were great, and I got some good shots with my Crowd Cam, despite the fact that this drunk woman was trying to grab it away from me, saying that I should be on camera because I'm so hot, as well as some other weird stuff I couldn't quite make out over the din.
` She also slapped my ass.
` In general, she was hanging on me and staggering around, flipping her long hair up and down, her huge boobs bouncing like they were spring-loaded, and every twenty seconds or so she would emit this 'pretending to yell' sound, which I thought was kinda cartoony and weird.

She had enthusiasm, I'll give her that -- she made up probably about 30% of all the commotion in the room!
` At one point, she shoved me straight into Lucas and I almost tripped over his guitar pedals and fell on him! I stepped on his guitar pedals instead, but luckily nothing bad happened... that is, until Lucas was in the middle of a guitar solo with the audience stomping to the rhythm, and this same woman stomped directly onto the guitar cord right where it met the pedal!

The music stopped abruptly, and the filming soon ended, right after the guitar cord jack was found snapped off inside the pedal! I continued to film the crowd a bit, as well as take some stills, of not only Lucas and the crowd, but Misfit too, who was also playing in between sets.

Despite one of Lucas' guitars being out of tune, and despite the fact that Johnny left Lucas not once but twice in order to get intoxicated with the audience members while Lucas played on by himself, and the fact that Johnny's drumming was too fast and also not the way Lucas had in mind for his own songs (Johnny claimed that Lucas wanting him to follow his own composition was 'snobby', even though Lucas let him drum whichever way he wanted in other songs) well, I say the Lou Ryan Band sounded pretty good.

However, Lucas is getting a new drummer after Johnny's delinquency.

After the main show segment, Heidi the sound girl insisted on being paid on the spot for both tonight and tomorrow's work, so Lucas scrounged $50 from the door so as to avoid feelings of resentment.
` Then, Lucas and I took a walk, got to talking to an amazingly friendly giant cat, then a thirtyish guy named Bill came along from his own break from the show, and recognized the cat as Larry's cat, also named Larry ("boy you have gotten big!") and we chatted for a while, with the cat climbing all over me.
` Then, Lucas and I walked around the block, greeted a homeless veteran whose right leg had been blown off, and went back around to Cowboy Steve's, where Lucas played some more with Al, Misfit and a couple other guys, then we loaded most of our stuff up and left. Except, Lucas forgot his glasses but luckily he has spares.


February 3, 2010:

Lucas has by now gotten his glasses and sound equipment from Larry and Cowboy Steve's, so everything's good there.
` Also, roommate Dale Divelbliss has been away on a trip for a few days and we were wondering if he was coming back -- his room is completely empty, though he has been living out of his suitcase. Finally, Lucas has managed to call him, and Dale said that he has only stayed a few days longer than he was expecting to and was actually coming back today with the rent.
` Good! Because if he doesn't, we're not going to be able to afford it!

On a lower note, I found that the night of the concert, Johnny had put a bottle of Lysol kitchen cleaner in my backseat with the cap not screwed on, and it had soaked into my back floormat, which explains why my car has been overwhelmingly lemon-fresh for the past few days!
` Luckily, it was confined to just the one mat, so removing it solved the problem.


February 5, 2010:

I've been so busy! Troy is fully moved-in now, though ironically we may lose the house if Dale doesn't come back today with rent! Even so, I don't expect that Johnny will have all his rent money since he's probably spent it all on his car as well as booze.

At least today he's finally admitted that he does owe Lucas money after denying it for so long -- after Lucas screamed at him at the top of his lungs for over an hour! He had to, though, because Johnny is such a stubborn liar, insisting, "I don't owe you anything!" the entire time!
` Lucas was screaming not only about money, but other stuff too, like how Johnny's excuse for everything is that he's 'robusk', and also that he thinks we're snobby because we say 'robust' with a 't', like that isn't the way it's spelled!
` Ignoring the dictionary, which I showed him, he still believes it's spelled with a 'k', so not agreeing with him makes us snobs!
` (It is similar in his insistence that genre is supposed to be pronounced 'jun-drah' instead of 'zhan-rah', and that we're Frenchy snobs for not going along with his pronunciation! Like anybody would know what jundrah is supposed to mean!)

Anyway, he expects us to excuse his rude behavior, his bummy clothes, his peeing on the toilet seat every time (even when the seat is up!), his slouchy ape-man walk, his lack of personal hygiene, his burping as loud as possible in front of potential new roommates, etc. because he is just too stupid to do these things right.
` Come on! There are a lot of mentally-challenged people who are more presentable than him! Johnny is just plain embarrassing to be in public with, but he doesn't get it!

Lucas even brought up the fact that Johnny wouldn't stop asking me to have sex with him and joking about it and stuff until Lucas, my boyfriend (now fiance) who is sharing this house with Johnny, actually said something about it!
` And who would want to have sex with someone who apparently works at being repulsive, anyway? It's not like he's even close to being seductive, I mean, come on! It seems as though every time Lucas wants him to be less smelly, Johnny purposely doesn't shower or brush his teeth just to piss Lucas off! It's really odd!
` Apparently, Johnny thinks that people like Bummy Bill, who lives in a crappy trailer and looks like some old homeless, alcoholic bum with rotten teeth and who beats his dogs, is how normal people are supposed to be!

On top of that, Johnny said that his friends hate Lucas, but Lucas has talked to many of them about him, like Dan and Chris, and even they opine that Johnny is a total bummy loser!
` Chris is around Johnny because Johnny is still in their band, Hillary's Bush (although Johnny hates them and Chris is also mean to Johnny), and, more amusingly, Dan describes Johnny as his 'period friend' because though Johnny is a drag, at least he only comes around once a month!
` I'm not joking!

And what else? Well, Lucas also brought up the fact that he drove Johnny to the hospital many times to see his dying mother (and even wore a clean suit with him), and later on, to her funeral, and also to Johnny's brother Joe's 'shotgun' wedding, at which Lucas performed live music for free!
` But after his mom was dead and he had no one to parade Lucas around in front of to show that he had at least one non-ghetto-rat friend, he's refused to show Lucas any respect!

So finally, after an hour of Lucas screaming about all this stuff, Johnny sounded like he was going to start crying, then went into his room while Lucas stood outside his door continuing to scream as loud as possible.
` At last, Johnny opened the door and finally admitted that yeah, maybe he owed some of that money... but not all of it!
` "So, at least I'm not a liar," said Johnny.
` "Then what do you call telling me, 'I owe nothing to you!' all this time?" Lucas said. "Not lying?"

It was harsh, and Johnny has gone away for the time being. Even Lucas is drained -- he is not used to having such anger flowing through him for that long! He's going to have to rest.


February 6, 2010:

Six words; Johnny's at it again -- right now!

First of all, earlier today I was here in my office -- it's all mine again! -- when Johnny's heater was sounding off its alarm because it got too hot or something. I could hear Johnny's TV and figured he was in there, but the alarm continued, so I opened up his door -- the sound was deafening! -- and found him passed out in bed, his cat Noll at his feet, staring at the heater.
` Oh my Dog, he's taken some pills, I thought. So I turned the heater down and went back to my office. Then, it started buzzing again, so I waited a minute, then went in his room and turned it off all the way.
` A little while later, I heard him noisily get up, turn his TV off, come out of his room with his jingling keys hanging off his belt, go into the bathroom, go out of the bathroom, then I heard our bedroom door open for a second, then slam shut, after which I heard Johnny run out the front door, keys jingling the whole way.

What was going on? For a minute there I had thought it was Lucas slamming the bedroom door, but then he came up to our room to get his keys so he could check the mail -- he had just done so earlier and found nothing in the mailbox, so he had set his keys back on the dresser. Well, they were gone -- and my coat was flung out in the middle of the room... from when Johnny had slammed the door, on which it had been hanging!
` Lucas looked everywhere he could think of for his keys, and then finally got ahold of Johnny on the phone. Johnny swore up and down that he didn't take them and told Lucas to keep looking for them.
` After a few minutes, Johnny actually called back to say, "Didja find 'em, huh? Didja?" Aha! And where had Johnny been on his way out? He had walked through the carport, which Lucas had thought was kind of strange. He found the keys underneath my car.
` Why he would throw them there, I don't know, as Lucas hadn't even been in my car today! Of course, he didn't know that, as he was too busy being knocked out by pills!

In other news, Heidi the sound girl has apparently bailed on working with Lucas until later on -- no wonder she insisted that he pay her at the show!
` Also, Dale is still not back, and hasn't been answering his phone, so it would appear that he's lied to us. But why would he tell us he was coming back? Boy, I'd love to know the dirt on him... what's he really up to?


February 7, 2010:

Superbowl Sunday, and not a Johnny in sight! I actually drove Lucas over to Dan's so that he could get drunk, and then picked him up later. Johnny luckily did not show up.
` Interestingly, Dan's apartment is in the same complex that I almost moved into once upon a time... and near where I thought I was going to be shot at, but that's another story.

So nice to know that Troy has a non-psychotic girlfriend -- actually, nice to know he has a girlfriend! Jennifer is her name, and he brought her over for the night. She's really nice, and also geeky... okay, I should stop using the 'g' word, but seriously, I am a geek myself and I usually have a liking for others with geeky qualities. They tend not to be antagonistic.

Anyway, it's just another sign that Troy is not a troublemaker. I mean, who did Johnny ever have? Char! And who did Brad ever have? Char! And who's the biggest psycho-bitch I've ever known? Char!
` Those two did not have good taste in women, although I do admit she was fairly well-put together.


February 8, 2010:

Though I'm the one in the math class, I didn't do so coherently in scorekeeping on the 'Jeopardy game' presentation for English class. I was a bit more functional than the software, despite my losing a lot of sleep over my English paper, though it is due in two days!
` We had six teams and only four colors of cards, so Shannon, the one who's done most of the work, put them together in such a way that our groups were Pink, Pillow, Yellow, Orange, Oreen, and Green.

At the moment, Lucas is sawing away at something with a hacksaw in our bathroom. I ask; "What the hell are you doing?"
` He says, "Nothing."
` Apparently he's destroying something because Johnny has stiffed us for almost $900.

Yeah.
` Lucas just got a phone message of Johnny saying, "I'm sorry I failed you! I don't want to owe you any more money, so I'm just going to not pay rent and leave."

What the hell? Like... he's not going to owe us money by owing us even more money! Does he really believe that makes sense?
` He hasn't taken most of his stuff, though at least he's taken his cat, who has been in the habit of eating our cats' food and puking it back up on the carpet, and also fighting with our cats.
` And since when has Johnny ever bought that cat food? Okay, so he got some for free from his mom's former house, but since that has run out, his cat has been eating our cats' food!

Oh, but Johnny did say he's giving us the speakers that Mark Stoeckle from Alison Chains gave him, so Lucas called Mark, despite the fact that Johnny's been deleting Mark's number off of Lucas' phone every time he called him.
` And how did Lucas find the number? By looking on the NAF Productions website, where Mark's cell number is posted!
` Anyway, Lucas called Mark, apologizing for being associated with Johnny, and Mark said that the speakers he gave to Johnny were pretty worthless, and that he could sell them for perhaps $250, not $1,000 as Johnny had claimed.

For the most part, it would appear that Johnny's generosity extends to leaving us with a stinky room to clean up.
` Seriously.
` Troy was standing about three feet from the door when Lucas opened it to demonstrate the smell... and Troy leapt back, exclaiming "Holy snap! That really stinks!"
` Shortly thereafter, Lucas wrote on Johnny's door, so that anyone who came in and helped him move out would see that; 'We knew this stinky bitch would find ANY excuse to NOT PAY!'
` He also found his VCR, which he had bought, in Johnny's room.
` A crash emanated from the room and Troy came upstairs, wondering if everything was alright. I explained that Lucas was apparently trashing Johnny's room, and Troy advised, "Be sure not to destroy anything valuable!"
` However, Lucas thought better of it and stopped, instead leaving a note about how Johnny gives Christians a bad name hanging on Johnny's rosary, above his picture of Jesus.

Oh yeah, and we're intending to keep the furniture Johnny had inherited for any new roommates who come in, since the last incident with the cops has shown us that there's nothing the cops can do. After all, what's he going to do with three beds besides his, as well as a futon and other furniture he doesn't have room for? He doesn't even have a place to move into!
` You know, it's ironic that Brad called the cops on us for supposedly kicking him out with no place for him to drive the U-Haul he rented to, and for wanting to keep our own bed, which he claimed was his... now Johnny has thrown himself out with no place to go and we do want to keep a bunch of his furniture because he ripped us off for $900! I think that's pretty fair, don't you?

You know, I didn't realize how stressful this stuff was until I was feeling good all January. The constant tension really does make doing anything really difficult, even without constant noise pollution!


February 9, 2010:

Lucas visited Landlady Roberta at work and told her of the situation. She knows she can't rent this house out to anyone else, it having not been updated since 1968, and really just wants to get rid of it! But who would ever want to buy it?
` We do!
` We can also offer her more than zero dollars a month, so it looks like we can stay, at least for now! Also, her son Zack, who works in the same office, had the same problem of everyone bailing out of his rental house in Everett, so he kind of knows what we're going through.

Anyway, Lucas worked out a deal with Roberta -- he'll put down his move-in deposit towards rent, paying a total of $1,700, and then do $1,700 worth of work around the house, such as replacing the downstairs sliding door with a French door.
` That way, if we still can't pay next month's rent, at least the house will be in better condition and they won't have to pay someone else to do all that work while getting zero dollars in rent!

Also while he was in town, Lucas went to Johnny's church to find that the priest isn't there on Tuesdays (it's not like he has Sundays off like most people!) so he left a note with a Xerox of the passage from the book of Matthew, which Johnny had asked Lucas to read.
` It's ironic, you see, because that book has been one of Lucas' greatest weapons against Johnny. For example, the passage about not putting your pearls before swine, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack! Hello? That's been Lucas' biggest mistake, and that's why he's not tolerating any more ghetto rats and low-lifes!

The passage that he had left on the priest's desk was the one about how to deal with a jerk who won't listen to you; find someone they know who they might listen to, and if that doesn't work, have a religious authority come in and try to talk sense into them, which was the whole idea behind Lucas paying the priest a visit.
` But what if that doesn't work? According to Matthew, Jesus says; "then let him be a gentile (Roman) and a tax collector." In other words, let him know he isn't welcome -- good advice to this day!
` The note Lucas left with the passage says that Lucas has been the one to take Johnny to see his dying mother in the hospital, as well as the funeral and wedding in that church... and now Johnny has just stiffed him $900!

Also, Lucas has found a new drum set for this drummer guy, Lowell, who has gotten in from India. It's nice and it's cheap, in a pawn shop! He has amazing drumming videos online (though I don't know where), so I hope he is able to drum for Lucas. He has a show on Thursday!

OMG!! At 1:56 is the BIGGEST COINCIDENCE EVAR! Lucas and I were about to leave for QFC when Lucas read aloud what he'd wrote on Johnny's door and said, "Maybe he's feeling too much shame to ever come back. Wouldn't that be great if he just never showed up again?"
` He walked into our bedroom to grab my car key, looked out the window and said, "Nope, I guess not! Here he comes now!"

They were in Joe's truck and they were there to pick up Johnny's stuff. Well, they got all the furniture from the rental rooms, so our ad that says the rooms are 'fully furnished' is now inaccurate.
` And what did Johnny say he was going to do with that furniture? Find a storage shed to put it in, and pay $75 a month just to keep it but not use it! So, Lucas asked him what if he can't pay that much money and loses it -- which seems probable. Johnny said he didn't care, as long as no one else gets to use it!
` He also started carrying off the speakers, claiming that he didn't give them to us to sell... after doing so just a few days ago! Right! Whatever! But, he left them at least.
` Lucas also insisted that Johnny pick up his drum kit right now, because otherwise he'd keep it! Meanwhile, I secretly videotaped a lot of the screaming back and forth as this was going on. It was intense and also very stupid.
` I was taping through my office window, and Violet jumped up into the window. When I put down the camera and went out onto the front deck, she jumped from the window to the carport roof to meow at us all.
` Then she jumped from the carport roof and onto the deck's railing and couldn't quite seem to figure out why Mommy and Daddy were yelling so much instead of loving on her, so she ran across the yard to find something better to do.

Later on, after Lucas and I had gone to QFC and swung by Dan's (though we didn't speak of what was going on, only of plans to hang out/camp etc.) Johnny and Joe came back for another load, and Johnny still denied throwing Lucas' keys under my car. I said, "I was in the next room, I heard you slam our bedroom door and then run out of the house!"
` Johnny said, "You're a liar!"
` But he knows that's not true. Still, it kind of hurts to be called a liar... I've been called that before by other jerks... not the least of whom was PsychoDad!

At last, later on he came back and finally got the rest of his stinky stuff out of his room! Basically, Johnny was all muttering and scowling about how he's such a victim while Lucas was treating Joe to a drink. Ah! Which reminds me, the horrible knot in my stomach has finally dissipated after that Bloody Mary!
` I hope it has dissipated for good -- I thought I was going to vomit for a while!


February 13, 2010:

Okay, so Lucas' Lou Ryan Band show was two nights ago, and I haven't been writing this crap down. Lucas was wearing pants this time, and talked of Phil, a 5o-year-old guy who works at Boeing, as being his drummer who is sick with the flu.
` At least, he would be Lucas' drummer, but as far as I know, the two haven't met in person since Phil really is sick with the flu and really doesn't want to make it worse by drumming on top of going to work, which was difficult enough!

Anyway, Lucas was up there playing his songs, his rock and blues, and even John Denver's Country Boy, which was amusing, as well as his originals, and he was being lively and funny despite the fact that there were only a few people there!
` For the most part, his friend Nate Fox, as well as Troy and Michael and I, were the only ones to show up for Lucas, though I had called a bunch of folks and also tried to get people from poetry night at Zippy's to stroll on over to the place next door when poetry was over, since that was when the show started!
` I even showed them my Lou Ryan Comics in an attempt to lure them over! It almost worked, but 'almost' doesn't mean much when you're counting heads.

There were, however, a few other patrons at the bar; one guy with a beard said he was a drummer, but he said he was giving himself a break because he was so OCD with it, staying up all night drumming until it was almost time to leave for work, etc. Wow! I've never heard of anyone being addicted to drumming before!

Anyway, today's been a long day, though I've spent a lot of it just typing this stuff in -- I started before noon, though have taken many breaks.
` Since I have my own computer and am not completely slammed with homework and household drama for now, I'll try to be more frequent about updating this blog and my photos, and that way this won't take so long.

Oh yeah... I haven't updated my Flickr account since partway through January... I have a TON of photos still on my camera, partly owing to Lucas' shows, but mostly they are all those drawings I'd photographed.
` That's my next project, which might take a few days as long as I use my old PC -- if I use my laptop, it will take weeks! I guess I'll start it tonight, though I was kind of hoping to burn my finally-finished home movies onto DVD with it first. (I could probably do that with my laptop, though, and it would most likely be faster!)

My latest photo, by the way? Lucas earlier today, burning the stinky, oily sheet Johnny has left behind! Anything to rid our house of stink... and it's nice cotton, burned like wood!

Well, I got to go! So many other things I need to do! Until next time, turn blue, climb walls, etc! Good night!

Pesky abusive roommates won't leave? Just evict yourself!

Though the domestic disturbances (refer to previous entry) have stopped, the drama has not. Brad and Crazy Char, and now Drunk-O-Steve, have basically pushed us to evicting ourselves. But the question is; are we really leaving our first nice home ever?
` Well, we weren't planning on it -- this is actually a bit of a ruse, only we may have to live up to it if we aren't convincing enough.

Yes, for real! Well, let's go back to where I left off in my adventures with my fiance Lucas and our cats, and roommates Johnny (who's relatively normal) our resident alcoholic Steve (a.k.a. Richard 'Dick' Goziña), and our dysfunctional non-rent-paying violent pieces-of-crap PsychoBitch Char and Neurotic Brad.
` After the last police incident with Brad (i.e. his whining 'I don't have anywhere to go with this U-Haul, I just rented it for no reason, and Lucas's bed is really mine and he won't give it to me'), we went hard on the merrymaking for a little while, which I documented for amusement's sake:


December 11, 2009:

Today is the day that Brad originally said he'd be out, but he's taken the U-Haul truck back without using it. I still can't figure it out -- why did he even rent it in the first place?
` I've been guarding the rooms all day while my fiance Lucas was off doing business as usual. In addition to the usual phone solicitors asking for me (because my name is on the cable bill), I've also been getting lots of stalker calls from some guy on both his work phone and his cell phone in succession (the number is displayed on Johnny's TV set), asking for either me or someone named Amanda, and I don't even know any Amandas!
` When Lucas got home with Johnny, Johnny answered the phone, said it's my stalker (for the eighth time today), and disconnected the line.

There's so much stuff going on right now, I don't know what to write next! For today, I went to the gym, then picked up Steve Goziña from work, cashed his paycheck, then he called Lucas and said, "My check bounced! ... I am absolutely kidding you!" which I am sure freaked Lucas out for a sec.
` He bought some beer, a raspberry Arizona iced tea for me, and on the way home, he told me about how he's in the third phase of weaning himself off alcohol, which I'll believe only if he continues to improve.
` After much horseplay with Johnny and Steve and Lucas, they started making up guitar ditties, using a beer bottle as a slide. After that, I watched Johnny do the "I like you but not like you-like you, but I like you," skit, while Lucas looked up at him warily and sank into his chair. To further weird Lucas out, both me and Johnny did the 'Japanese Butterfly Meditation', with Johnny standing in front of the couch and me standing on the couch, flapping our arms frantically in a very un-butterfly-like-way. Hilarous!
` Then we were talking about how Johnny's selling his huge speakers, which Mark... Stoekl or whatever his name is, the bass player from Alice In Chains, had actually used himself. Now Steve Goziña's playing Gallows Pole by Zeppelin.
` Oh that's right! Johnny also has had a song made up about him! "Johnny's shenanigans!/He's runnin' aroundagain!' I am reminded because Steve is now playing "Johnny's a fag." And now Johnny is singing about Steve sucking c... I mean, yeah, the same sort of thing.

We had some adventures going to a few stores, more conversations with the landlord, then back out again with Steve Goziña for some Chinese food. While getting this food, we noticed this hot chick his age at the Mexican restaurant next door who was flirting with him through the glass! Aw, man! Why did I drive off? Steve is still thinking about her! Should I have left him there with his food?
` Back to the room again. It's only nine and Lucas is exhausted, both cats are lying down in here too. Violet keeps licking her foots. I stepped out to throw the Arizona iced tea can outside and Johnny was saying something about loading something, and demonstrated by climbing onto the makeshift dining room table and humping the air above it.
` Then Steve's phone rang and he said, "It's my boss!" and Johnny froze in mid-hump. Then Steve said, "Oh wait, no, it's Rob." and Johnny resumed his pelvic thrusting; "So here's how I loaded it..." Johnny continued. Good grief! You know, last week, he climbed up on the fridge in some kind of indoor mountain climbing thing, but this is much better!
` So now I'm just trying to chill in the bedroom, hoping Brad doesn't go ballistic when he gets home. I don't want the cops here again, but if they are, well, Brad would be arrested.


December 12, 2009:

Most of today I worked on, and finally finished writing the title and description of hundreds of science books, each one on its own index card, in order to expedite my being able to do research, as for the Corrigendopedia and other projects. There must have been fifty left for me to do, but thanks to Amazon.com, I've finished my list!
` Then, Lucas and I went to the gym and then grabbed a sub and a milkshake on the way home. I enjoyed mine by the fire while Steve was using his laser pointer to play with Violet, who seemed bewildered that she couldn't trap it in her deadly clawrs.
` Oh, Brad is home and seems to be angry, as usual.


December 16, 2009: Forced to leave our own house! Not.

Last night, Brad got the news that he finally has a place to move into... in eight days! And little do they know, Lucas and I are expecting the landlord to post a three-day eviction notice on the door today, so I'm not looking forward for when the feathers hit the fan.

Back to last night's news, Brad and Char whooped and hollered and even I did too! Them leaving is good for all of us! It's close to Brad's job, and there's a park down the street and several nearby shops!
` However, it wasn't long until there was a crisis -- Brad couldn't find his wallet and Char went running down the street, yelling and in general disturbing the public. A few minutes after Char canceled her debit card, which was in the wallet, Brad found it. Unfortunately, this was right at five-o'clock, so the bank was closed and Char couldn't call to un-cancel the card!
` I'd had to get a new debit card myself two weeks ago, so I consoled her and got her to focus on her new apartment and the fact that she'll probably save money not having a debit card for a little while, plus, she won't have to worry about getting a new one for a few years now. She seemed to feel better, which is also good for all of us.

Later on last night, Beer Goziña was also refusing to pay rent if Brad and Char weren't, and was drunkenly ranting that he was going to shoot us all! Luckily, he apparently doesn't have a gun.
` Then, even later, Char was knocking on our bedroom door for some reason, asking us to be quiet. What was she hearing? We weren't even moving around or talking or anything! And why would she even ask us that if we're the ones who are paying for her to live here, since Lucas returned their rent money for the rest of the month so they could move out, which as you'll recall ended in an unexpected disaster!

So today, after Brad gets home and sees the eviction notice, he'll probably blow up, and if one of us has to call the cops a third time, the leaseholders -- that would be me and Lucas -- will be evicted ourselves.
` And another thing, I don't know how we'll pay rent, since Lucas refunded Brad just before he called the cops on us, and Goziña also won't pay, so we basically have two rooms occupied by squatters, thereby preventing us from moving in folks who will pay the rent!

Speak of the devil -- here's some resolution! Still parked in the street near the crackhouse we used to live in, just after Johnny got into his newly-fixed car and drove off to visit his mom in the hospital, Lucas got a call from Steve the landlord, who said he can give us a discount on rent! Whee! Maybe we can pull through!

When we got back home, Steve Goziña was also in a good mood because he found the 18-pack of beer that we all thought had disappeared a month ago. Perhaps at the time Steve had tried to hide it but was too drunk to remember?
` In sad news, Johnny's mom is going to a hospice, and he is understandably upset. As far as Lucas and I go, we probably won't be able to stash our valuables at Johnny's brother's house while we are staying in the hotel.

It's now many hours later, 4 o'clock, and we've changed our plans -- we're no longer going to stay in a hotel room. Basically, we're in the parking lot at the gym, at which I watched part of Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince while on the exercise bike, and Lucas and Steve the landlord are plotting our 'escape' from Brad, Char and Steve Goziña.
` You won't believe this -- Steve the landlord has changed his plan from evicting Brad and (and Steve, for that matter) to pretending to evict all of us so that their attacks will stop! It's a good thing that Lucas, Johnny and I are such good actors!


December 17, 2009:

So, back to last night; we were waiting to be served our fake ten-day eviction notice so we could make like we were moving out by Christmas.
` After running around town and exchanging our printer/scanner for one without paper stuck in it (apparently this is the only solution to resolving a paper jam, even though the machine worked just fine!), we were waiting to receive the notice late at night.
` But, as Johnny and Lucas had a gig to play at Tony V's, they didn't have time to wait any longer, though I was too asleep to go with them. However, they soon returned anyway because Tony V, who wasn't there, had apparently forgotten all about them, and the stage wasn't even set up!
` The ten-day eviction notice didn't come until today, and Goziña was bummed out by it. Unfortunately, he also said he's staying until the fifth of next month anyway! Dammit! How will we be able to continue living here beyond ten days without him knowing about it?
` In other news, Johnny got his cat Noll from his mom's house (as his mom will not be returning home), and now our cats are having an interesting time!

When Char came upstairs to wash out her cup, I told her -- in a completely neutral tone of voice -- that all of us were being evicted because of the domestic disturbances and police visits (which, I didn't add, she and Brad were solely responsible for), and she rolled her eyes and said with a sarcastic smile, "Oh well, it sucks to be you!"

Just like that! After all the hard work I've put into consoling her and being caring towards her, and empathizing with her side of things when others wouldn't, and she hears I'm about to be thrown out of my own house (for her bullshit, not mine!), and all she can say is 'sucks to be you'?
` She's never spoken to me like that before (and conversely, I've never spoken like that to her, either)! I've done everything to get on her good side and prevent her from ever hating me, but you know, I think she's hated me all along anyway!

Why the sudden change? I have an idea; as of yesterday, she's had an apartment to move into where she won't ever see me again, so now she doesn't want to pretend she doesn't hate me and won't even be civil with me!
` Let me tell you, if this had been a real eviction for us, I would have probably smacked her bitch-ass face, and I've never smacked anyone except in an emergency! I mean, what a bitch! Can you believe that? I'm telling you, she doesn't act like a human being! She acts like... my dad!

After my daily trip to the gym (during which I saw more of The Half-Blood Prince), Brad came home and Lucas told him the news as well.
` Brad, who isn't a psychopath (but has a tendency to be manipulated by them to the point where he's nearly been murdered), didn't even say anything, which is good; I mean, what is he supposed to say? "I'm sorry my mind games got you kicked out of your house"?
` As long as he doesn't feel resentful any more, that's all that matters, because getting him (and Goziña) off our backs is the whole point of this fake eviction.


December 18, 2009:

I've been rearranging furniture and appearing to pack up my stuff. I am way past feeling weird for tricking these folks into thinking we're in the same boat as them. I've never tried to start a conflict with anyone in this house, so I should not have to put up with being attacked for other people's insecurities.
` Luckily, Steve is always nice towards me, and Brad has been subdued since yesterday. However, the root of this whole thing, Char, is a different story; she's genuinely crazy and needs to go. Preferably to a padded room.

And today, after months of living in the same house as me, she finally blew up at me... though she was also angry at the time.

And to think I've been nothing but understanding towards her and her frustrations whenever she came to me with them, like the time she got pissed about something to do with broccoli and threw a knife in exasperation (luckily not at anyone).
` I have even let her pick out a couple of my psychology books to read because it interests her, though thankfully she forgot about them and left them on the kitchen counter.
` I've always acted like I was on her side, thinking that as long as I didn't try to correct her or help her like Brad and Lucas have (resulting in most explosive fights!), she might not get impatient with me.
` As I found out yesterday, her 'vulnerable' state is apparently also an act, and my sympathy only enabled her to get away with being more bitchy towards me than ever. But then, what was I supposed to do? Be screamed at for disagreeing with her?

Luckily she spends most of her time in her room, so I don't see her but once a day. Yesterday's interaction with her was the "sucks to be you" thing, and that was it. But today, she actually directed her anger towards me. Granted, she was already angry.
` Lucas and Johnny were at the store, when Johnny called me and said to put Noll back in his room. I was just doing that when she approached me with a letter from Social Security, and demanded, "Who got the mail?"
` I said I didn't know, not at all liking to be trapped with her in a narrow hallway.
` She said; "This was on the table downstairs, from two days ago, and no one told me!"
` "Okay," I said, trying to scrutinize the meaning of this. Was that time-sensitive mail, or was she being a time-sensitive female? Seriously!
` Then she showed me that the letter was sealed with quite a bit of Scotch tape. "You don't just send letters taped up in the mail," she said. "It would be nice if I could speak to Lucas about this."
` "Okay..." I said, as the meaning of this began to register.
` "I'd like to speak with him immediately, if possible."
` "Oh," I said, "he's at the store right now."
` "Well, doesn't that just figure?" she growled as she turned and stormed back out of the hallway.
` So I called Lucas about this and he said he had brought in the mail, though he thought she was making up the thing about the tape until I told him I saw the tape myself. In any case, he said, she was just trying to make trouble, and advised me to call the police if she did anything crazy.
` So, I went downstairs, where she was on the phone with her mom, freaking out over how this could have happened. Who had done it?
` I almost walked away, but in light of the fact that she really does hate me, she might decide that it was my doing, so I decided to tell her the truth. Finally, I got her attention and said, through the crack of her door, "Hey Char, I called Lucas and he said he was the one who brought in the mail the other day."
` "Ha! I knew it!" she exclaimed, sending chills up my spine.
` I quickly tried to add, "I've gotten mail taped up like that too," but all I managed to get out was "I've," before she said, "Excuse me, I'm talking to my mom."
` "I'm just trying to say," I said, and the rest of my sentence was blocked out by her screaming, "I didn't ask to talk to you!" and she literally slammed the door in my face!

And to think she had confided in me and I had been friendly towards her when she pulled this crap on other people and then spun it so that it seemed like they were being unreasonable! I might have tried getting her to ask questions about all this, but there's no way in hell I was going to risk getting on that scary bitch's bad side!
` But, as it turns out, I have been on her bad side all along and she's never let me know until now! What a naive fool I've been all this time, and she probably thinks the same!
` It's like the story of the frog who lets the scorpion ride on its back; the scorpion stings the frog, and both animals drown! I guess the moral of the story is; it's dangerous to be accepting of people who think it's okay to be assholes, because then they're going to think they can do it to you, too, no matter what the cost!
` Only thing is, I'm not supporting her anymore, so she can sting away and it has no effect whatsoever on her!

So; anything positive happen today? Well, as a matter of fact, I later on went to the gym and they were having a Christmas party, so I partook in the veggies, cheese, cookies, nuts, apple cider, and eggnog. There was also water with lemon slices and water with cucumber and strawberry slices, and I was tempted to fill my water bottle up with them, but decided against that.
` Plus, when I finally got upstairs I found that The Half Blood Prince was playing once again, and managed to see the exact hour I had missed in between the parts I'd seen at the beginning and at the end. So, in my roundabout way, I've seen the whole movie!


December 19, 2009:

Poor Johnny. His mom has been in a coma for the past few days and is hovering around death. His entire family is taking up practically the whole floor of the hospital, which has been kind of a hassle for the employees.
` It seems they won't be clogging up the place for very long.

How about something not depressing?

Instead of Harry Potter again at the gym, I turned on my mP3 player and listened to, I think it was, episode 114 of the podcast Skepticality, where Derrick and Swoopy were interviewing the hosts of another skeptical podcast called Monster Talk.
` Not surprisingly, they were talking about how sensationalist TV shows like MonsterQuest don't allow serious scientists who actually study phenomena like Bigfoot and Nessie to ever say more than one or two sentences because (shocker!) those shows manufacture mysteries (e.g. "no one can explain this!") in order to rope in more viewers.
` They're just trying to make a buck, but in a way, it makes no sense: How is it that the Discovery family of TV channels that profess to be associated with science and history make stupid shows about monsters and the paranormal and then don't let actual scientists get involved? Why would they do that?

One of the hosts of Monster Talk was relating one of the experiences he'd had being interviewed for an episode of MonsterQuest. This one was about El Chupacabra, something he knows a lot about.
` He spoke with Joe the producer about using all this material he had on the subject -- presumably things like known information of what all known chupacabras are discovered to be, like dogs and other animals -- but they didn't even acknowledge it on the show!
` Not only that, but two scientists who were similarly ignored on MonsterQuest were later interviewed on Monster Talk and this time were able to tell the listening audience about what they didn't get to say about extinct animals and genetic analysis, which were their fields of expertise!

These are only the three most recent cases of tons more I've heard from experts in trickery, psychology, earth sciences, etc. who have similarly face the problem of sensationalist shows not acknowledging all the documents, videos, etc, they bring with them, and editing their hours of interview footage down to what's called 'token skepticism' of only a few seconds of sound byte that is specially selected just to make them look like an ignorant ass.
` It is this treatment of such experts that used to make me think they were indeed ignorant asses, but this is merely what the makers of such shows want you to believe, so that you view the commercials on their station. That's what commercial TV programming is, really, just filler to get you to the next commercial!

Come to think of it, this is still depressing stuff!

Now, I don't expect most people to care about such biases in the entertainment industry (well, it's not like they're called the education industry), but this treatment of people who know a subject back and front, but can't be represented in credulous entertainment TV because they basically know too much, is rather disturbing to me.

So, after the gym, I was going to make some spaghetti for the both of us, but poor Lucas was so painfully hungry (being on a diet and all) that he couldn't wait long enough, so we wound up in the drive-thru at Taco Bell.
` Basically, this crazy woman in the dorky square vehicle in front of us took literally fifteen minutes just to order three tacos, while Lucas laughed at her for evidently having some kind of mental problem, then began twitching and finally honked his horn, which had no effect to her rambling and rambling on. It was just... incomprehensible.
` Then after paying for four items, it wasn't until we got home that we found only three in the bag. Lucas was too hungry to be pissed for long, though.

Well, I'd say that's sad, maybe pathetic, but not quite depressing. That's good enough for now. It's eleven o'clock, so I predict that there will at least be nothing more to make this day worse.

More police involvement -- all our nightmares are coming true!

Things have only gotten worse since my last update. It's escalated into a bizarre type of hostage situation.

December 8, 2009:

I just aced my Critical Thinking finals today, despite the fact that I've been worrying about Brad and Char stealing stuff while I'm gone.
` This morning I rescued Lucas' blender from the pile o'stuff that they had rounded up to take with them. It was the blender we bought and used to make smoothies, and I took pictures of our little cats sticking their heads in to lick the inside. It's cracked now, but it still works.
` I think Char's bitchy comment says it best: "I don't want it anyway because it's broken!"
` Uh, good?
` I think they also have Lucas' waffle iron, but who cares? As long as they're leaving! Yesterday, Brad was storming around the house, yelling, "Where's my damn bottle opener?" Then he knocked on my bedroom door, wondering if I had it.
` I presumed he meant the one Lucas bought when he inherited all that wine he couldn't sell. I gave that one to him just to shut him up.

I hope they don't take our can opener too! I'm leaving the one remaining spoon of mine in my room so it doesn't get taken. It escaped last time my silverware got stolen, but I'm not taking chances with it this time!
` We're also making double-sure no one takes anything, what with the new locks on our bedroom door, and my office door!


December 9, 2009:

Charolotte wrote Brad's initials on our radiator in red lip liner! What was she doing in our bedroom? Squeezing out the rest of my coveted VERY LAST BOTTLE of Step 1 of my TriClear acne treatment, apparently! I remember how I used to scream at people for using most of it up to wash their hands, and now all I have is a pile of containers of Step 2 and Step 3!

She's been hanging out in the kitchen doing weird stuff, like sitting on the counter and arranging the cans in the cupboard, just so she can pick fights with anyone who comes by.

Here's some of my favorite 'bitch comments' by Char:

Receiving a phone call from a bill collector or some such, who I could hear ask, "Can you use your credit card?" Char replied; "I don't use credit cards, 'cause they're a ripoff."

My cats were pushing a can around on the kitchen floor, and I said; "There's some real cuteness right there!"
` She said, "I don't like cats."
` Gee, I guess she never liked her own cat, Trouble, that she missed so much!

Knowing that Char is resentful towards other people for supposedly not cleaning, I mentioned, "I cleaned the kitchen floor."
` She said, "Oh, sweet! It's really shiny and everything! If you hadn't mentioned it I never would have noticed because the floor's been so dirty I haven't been able to look down at it!"

I'm serious. It may make a great comedy movie, but at the same time this isn't funny.

In better news, Brad's announced that he has a place to move into. We're all celebrating! At last we will all have peace! (Or at least Lucas, Johnny, Steve and I will, but we think Brad's pretty much screwed with pregnant bitch-girl.)


December 10, 2009:

Earlier today, Lucas had actually driven to Brad's workplace to give him a refund for rent and the receipt. Then, we moved all of his stuff down by the front sliding door so he wouldn't have to come up and carry it down himself, and so we wouldn't have to deal with him as long as we stay upstairs.
` I got some pictures of the chaos.

It's like nine in the evening and Brad's finally got a U-Haul to load up his stuff, as he said he would, but he's not loading up his stuff! Instead, he's physically threatening Lucas and trying to start a fight, hurling insults, and screaming at the rest of us, calling us losers!
` On top of that, you may recall that for some time, Brad has had these pet fish he's been 'the father' of, talking to them and playing with them and showing them off to other people! Just now he told Johnny to "drain the tank and throw the motherfucking fish in the garbage!"

Oh my god!! Does he know what he's saying? And he seemed to expect that Johnny would actually do it, too!

Lucas told me to stand here in the hallway, guarding the bedroom in case he tries to steal our bed. Johnny just passed by, went into my office, stepped over Violet and the pillow I was sitting on in my office and placed Lucas' MacPro by the far bookshelf. I got a photo of Violet being unfazed.
` I'm to call the police if Brad tries to steal anything. Now Lucas and Johnny are bringing more equipment into my office. Apparently, Brad wants his computer desk, which Lucas had all this stuff on. That's fine and all, because it was given to Brad and not Lucas, though I don't know why he'd want it; it's and enormous waste of space considering he has no use for it.

I cannot believe this is happening! Two weeks ago, Brad was thanking Lucas for all the things Lucas had done for him, e.g. helped get him a job, a car, a driver's license, helped him and Char get to the hospital, not to mention talking the cops out of arresting him for what Char did to him! Brad actually shook Lucas' hand and said, "You are the finest man I've ever met."
` And now he's screaming and ranting and swearing at Lucas and wants our bed! It's not even his to take! When Brad was getting all the furniture from that old lady, he got his own bed! As they were leaving, Lucas had asked her; "What's the story with that other bed?"
` The lady had said, "That's just my daughter's bed. She hardly ever sleeps on it, so I was going to sell it. Do you want it?"
` She gave the bed to Lucas, not Brad! Lucas was chipping in, he bought the U-Haul for bringing that furniture to our house at the time (the Crazy Landlady's Condemned House), he was given the bed, so it's his while all the other stuff was Brad's!
` But he still wants our bed! What for? Technically, he already has two! What could he possibly do with another bed?

OH MY GOD! BRAD'S CALLING THE COPS ON US! He's in the bathroom talking to them right now! He's saying we're KEEPING HIS BED! WHAT THE HELL?!?!

Lucas is now calling the cops back, I guess you could say. I locked my office door from the outside and now we're hiding in our bedroom.

Two officers were here pretty fast and questioned Lucas and Brad thoroughly. Apparently, Brad told them he thought we were trying to throw him out on the street. But he has a place to move into, doesn't he? That's what he told his roommates here!
` But he told the cops something else; that he has nowhere to go!
` Then what's the U-Haul for? Hauling furniture, right? He was taking his furniture to his new place in Marysville, right? If he doesn't have a use for the U-Haul truck, then why did he spend his own money renting it?

Lucas also explained about the bed. Officer Falso told us that Brad claimed the bed was his own, and that he had made sure Lucas understood he would have to give it back if Brad moved out.
` Brad made that up!
` Falso said that he basically saw how much of a maniac Brad was, but he couldn't help us in the way that a judge can. As the cops were on their way out, I heard Brad comment that Lucas was 'a fast talker'.
` A little while later, I heard Brad say, "I showed him!" Who does he think he's fooling? Char maybe? He also said he was taking the U-Haul back for a refund! (Fat chance.) Why did he have the U-Haul again?

Oh God! We've had to move all of Lucas' guitars and stuff into our bedroom because Brad said, "I'm gonna take something valuable of his," and was looking at Lucas' stuff downstairs!
` Ah! Feel the fear! I'm just going to be brave! I love being brave, not. I locked my camera in the other room, so no pictures of us all crammed in here with all the stuff and the cute Teddeh Bunnehs (cats) who are sleeping with their faces buried in their paws.

I hope Brad doesn't try to take them!

Well, that's how it sits right now. We're trapped in our bedroom guarding our stuff. I'll be back soon with more news, most likely bad news.