Monday, July 19, 2010

Better for me, worse for my stupid roommate

I have a huge amount to post since last time, and yet only June's text and photos have been up -- since June! -- but, I apparently considered the antics of July too unimportant to put up here, so that'll be next post.

But first... a big, shineh flower spike!

june 033 Fully in bloom!

In all my hubbub about Lucas last post, I forgot to mention just how cool I am. Somewhere near the end of those journal entries, I forgot to mention how I actually obtained for Lucas some pharmaceuticals that he needs for his condition.
` Now, he's been strung along in jobs and then laid off before qualifying for health care, so he's always had to pay for medical treatment out of his pocket, and he can't get any doctors to prescribe what he needs, so he has to get them illegitimately, and the one time he wasn't able to get any... well...
` I covered all about that in a post I wrote back in March of 2008, back when we lived in the ghetto. Here's a 'clip' that entertainingly describes the nightmarish difficulties we faced when we weren't able to get any meds for Lucas (called by his superhero name, Lou Ryan):
...[I]t was hard for me to make myself sit still. Superhero Lou Ryan, however, could hardly be any more still: As he trains his muscles to not do the wrong things anymore, they periodically lash back by agonizingly seizing up. (Kind of ironic, huh?)
` He had specifically been referred to a doctor who could prescribe him the narcotic Soma, which is the only pain reliever that actually works for this level of muscle tension and pain. (Lou knows this because he's tried them all, whether he's wanted to or not.) He had waited months for this appointment because his regular doctor had refused to give him any, just in case he was a narcotics-abuser. At his appointment, however, he learned that the new doctor is unable to prescribe anybody any kind of narcotics at all due to a little mistake some years back.

...Then why was he referred to her at all? How does this happen?

This doctor told him to go to the ER, but Lou wasn't willing to pay a ton of money, nor the hundred bucks he'd paid to see her, so at least she gave him a refund. Defeated, Lou Ryan returned, limping through the door to me....

On Saturday, March 8, I was really stressed out because a) Lou's muscle tension had gotten worse, and b), because I had found out that we're having to move out of our apartment very soon. ...
` I was barely able to concentrate on doing homework that day. As for Lou Ryan's pain, he was almost in tears despite having had a potent dose of Vicodon, beer, and other tasty treats. Where did he get the Vicodon? Let's just say that a little bird being treated at the methadone clinic is overflowing with narcotics....
` Of course, the stupid Vicodons didn't get rid of the pain - in fact, they didn't help at all! He was immobilized and/or asleep for the entire day, wonky to the point that he wasn't sure of what day it was.

It was because of this that Sunday was the worst, most disruptive day of all! Lou Ryan was awoken by agonizing muscle pain, and one of his legs was so tense that he couldn't even get out of bed (much less back into bed after I'd gotten him up).
` With Lou Ryan utterly unable to save the town, should it need saving, this was quite a serious emergency. So, it was off to the Room of Emergency! But first, I had to put his socks and shoes on for him (!) and help him out the door. As we were struggling up toward the gravel driveway, who should pull up behind my car but two retarded former neighbor kids!
` Needless to say, Lou started yelling and screaming at him [the son] to get his ficking car out from behind mine because we needed to get to the Emergency Room, NOW!
` The smartass guy said; "I was just going to pick up my mom!"
` At that moment, Lou had stepped awkwardly and couldn't move at all, so I had to act as a prop for him to lean on. Having backed down the alley some, the neighbors watched intently for the next few minutes as I assisted Lou with getting up the hill and into the car - he couldn't even shut the door [himself]!

By the time we'd gotten to the ER he couldn't even walk far enough to get to the door, so some firefighters helped him into a wheelchair and that was much easier to get around in!...
...But my homework wasn't there, now, was it?
` I figured I'd have a late start [on homework], but I'd at least have some time after Lou got a couple of Somas to set him off for the next several weeks. But the doctor who greeted us wasn't very much into this idea - in fact, he looked like he was about to burst out laughing.

"Somas don't relax your muscles," he kept saying. "They make you sleep, and sleeping makes your muscles relax."
` Alright... I know this, and Lou knows it too: Soma doesn't even make Lou drowsy (for some odd reason), and as you might recall he had just been wrenched awake by huge leg cramps, so I don't think sleeping has much to do with it.
` ...[J]ust one dose cures him of this debilitating pain, or at least it's gone for six weeks or so until he progresses and his muscles start fighting back again (resulting in a different constellation of hyper muscle tension). Why, I have no clue, but I've seen it work several times - which is always a good thing because Lou doesn't have his own wheelchair.
` But nooo, apparently the doctor thought that Lou was probably an opiate junkie and was just making up some kind of pathetic excuse to get meds - either way, he kept telling Lou that hospital policy involved never prescribing walk-ins any narcotics, lest they be looking for a fix.
` Honestly, I think the guy needed a black eye to go with his condescending grin.
` His name? Dr. Dickson! (He must be so much like his father!) The only thing he would give him was - get this! - Vicodon!
` Exqueeze me? Isn't that part of the reason he came in there in the first place? [As you'll recall, he had so many Vicodons in his system that he was loopy.] Sayy, just how much time and money were we wasting?

As the doctor started walking away, Lou lost his composure and broke into tears. Dickson was still adamant that the Vicodon would be strong enough for his pain. Give me a break - that already didn't do anything, and he couldn't even stand up, much less walk out the door!
` That was when Lou began wheeling himself down the hallway, shouting; "I didn't come into an Emergency Room on a Sunday morning just to be told there's nothing wrong with me!" He was, as you might say, bitching on wheels. ...
` It is best to avoid a raging superhero, as they can be quite formidable even while they are paraplegically ambulating themselves down an ER hallway, hurling their dignity away by ranting about how tons of junkies get thousands of Somas from methadone clinics while people who need them for legitimate medical reasons can't even get a prescription!
` Finally, at the central part of the emergency wing he managed to get the attention of someone who suggested talking to the head nurse. Sold! Long story short, she got him a shot of Diladin and in three minutes he was already walking around - and he wasn't sleepy even though she said he would be!
` When the head nurse came back she was absolutely stunned to see him up and doing stretches, as opposed to sitting in a drugged stupor!

Now he could walk out the door!
It's been over two years since then and we're now waiting to receive the benefits of the formerly-Republican Health Care Plan, now called by Right-Wing Republicans the 'Liberal Democrat Health Care Plan of Certain Doom' because it's tainted by association with their sworn enemy, President 'Hitlerobama'.
` It'll take about three years before Lucas receives any benefits, and when that day comes, the U.S. will finally have entered the twentieth century, so saith the Europeans.

In the meantime, Lucas has been very on-top-of getting Somas so that such a nightmare hassle doesn't happen again. His usual source, a sweet lady who needs cash, is more than willing to sell him some of her medication for a profit.
` Unfortunately, she happens to be the wife of Joe, the brother of our former stinky roommate, 'Robusk' Johnny. He isn't as stinky, but he's almost as unpleasant. And he crushed a kitten to death. And he abuses his children. And he threw all the family memories and legal documents out in the rain after his mom died. Nice guy!
` Well, he's at it again.
` Joe seems to think that his wife is having affairs with Lucas when he buys his medication from her, so he's been commandeering her cell phone and not letting Lucas into the house, instead giving him the medication and pocketing the money for himself.

Well, we've been rebelling. It's like when Princess Leia said to Governor Tarkin: "The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers."
` I don't know how this woman tolerates such treatment, but she does roll her eyes at his stupidity. Lately, we've had to call using different people's phones and different voices so Jealous Joe doesn't suspect anything.
` Well, it was my turn to call, and I didn't get her or Joe, I got her mother, who said she'd be back in an hour. But, apparently my name's on their Caller I.D., so Joe called me back and asked to talk to Lucas.
` I hung up on him and told Lucas what happened. Well, it wasn't such a big deal since Lucas wasn't in pain yet, but... then Lucas had this genius idea that I call Joe back and pretend that Lucas was too disgusted with him to bother calling, and that he told me not to call, but I was anyway because he was in too much pain, and please don't tell Lucas I called!
` So I did.

AND IT WORKED!

I said I had fifty bucks, but he said he only had $20 worth. Well, I only brought $30 with me to our meeting spot, and he asked if I had $50 -- anticipating this I said, "Oh, I left my other twenty in my emergency envelope."
` Ha!
` And I got the whole bag of meds for $30! Upon giving Joe a ride back up the hill in my poor, limping car, he said "I don't know why Lucas has to cop and attitude" -- of course, he damn well knows! He also said he'd "keep it under wraps from Lucas" and that I can call him anytime if I need to!

YES!

And that isn't even getting into any of the stuff that's happened since my last post on June 11!

So, what's been going on? Do you know, Vada?

june 034 Vada in a stripe of sunshine

"Arrrgh! The dreaded Day Star!"

What about you, Violet?

june 036 Violet in my office window

"I is blinded by the light! Can't see you right now!"

What about you, Troy?

june 040 Troy has that 'radiation' thing covered

Oh, never mind, I'll have to tell you myself:

I'm not sure what day it was, but one evening, Lucas and I were trying to practice Spanish and Rick had his TV turned up, Andrew had his music turned up to drown out the TV, and then there was this extremely loud motor noise outside that went on for ever!
` This was all driving me so crazy that I just had to go on a walk, so I went a couple blocks and saw the source of the noise -- a Stanley Steemer truck, at ten at night! Just then, a large vehicle came up the driveway, and this really drunk woman got out the passenger side, apologized for being plastered and for the noise, and explained what had happened.
` Apparently, her cousin's daughter, who has MRSA, was staying with her and poisoned her dogs! One of them died, and she had her other dog, a black poodle, with her, said he needed shots every day to help him recover. She was drunk, she said, because it was helping her to deal with the pain.
` Her husband, who had been driving, didn't say anything, but he looked very solemn. The woman, whose name I can't quite remember, said that this girl had flooded the lower floor of her house and apparently couldn't clean it up, so she had the Stanley Steemer truck over to do it.
` Wow.
` I suggested that, since I had some pretty crazy roommates, when someone threatens you, and there's no civil way to get rid of them, just be a jerk to them so they can't feel welcome, and she said, "Thank you, I needed to hear that."
` Then, this girl wearing pajamas came out of the house and was acting kind of sheepish, came out of the house and told her that she'd tried to call her, and the woman said "I told you, I didn't take my cell phone with me." I surmised that must be the guilty criminal there.
` Indeed, killing someone's dog is a crime, or so Lucas told me. Well, good! It ought to be! I should have told that woman to call the cops, in that case!


June 15, 2010:

I've been really hard at work on my note-cataloguing, copying notes neatly into my little notebooks for The Corrigendopedia.
` I have a post on that, with a photo of my binders full of notes here, in case you were wondering how dedicated I am. 'Cause I'm that dedicated.
` Unfortunately, I am running out of paper, and my binders are almost full, and Lucas stopped by Staples to get me some, but they were no longer carrying them. Oh noes!


June 16, 2010:

Not only was I all poopy from not finding any more paper and binders at the paper store near the gym, but there was a pathetic mean girl with bleached hair and a fake tan at the gym todayyyyyy!
` I just about to get on the elliptical I usually got onto, because it was farthest away from the music speaker, and without even putting my water bottle on it, as I usually did, I turned around to look at what was playing in the movie theater, and when I turned back this girl was just stepping onto it!
` I said, "Oh, I was just about to get on that!"
` And she said, "There's one just like it right there!"
` Instead of saying, "Well, if you think so, why don't you get on it?" I said, "Uh, that one makes an annoying clicking sound." Well, it was true.
` She said, "There's another one right there, too."
` I said, "It's right next to the speaker."
` Then she said, "Well, at least there's ellipticals actually open today. You know, sometimes there aren't any that are free at all!"
` Bitch.
` I slumped away to the elliptical by the speaker in defeat, only the music coming out of it was driving me crazy, and making it impossible for me to hear my podcast (I love you, Brian Dunning!). So, after a half hour, she got off the machine, but I didn't have the heart to get on it myself.
` Bitch.
` I obtained a hug from Lucas, and we left early. On our way home, he told me that the pathetic bitch was griping about the incident to her even more pathetic, fat ugly friend whom she probably keeps to make sure the guys look at her.
` According to Lucas, she was saying, "Oh my god, what kind person wants to get on one particular machine? That's just so stupid! I can't believe it!" and on and on for several minutes.
` How fricking pathetic!
` I hadn't wanted to contest her possession of the elliptical -- I mean, it was only an elliptical, and I wondered if I was overreacting -- but Lucas said what I should have done is turn to directly face her and say, "If they're all the same to you, then why not switch machines yourself?"
` Next time, Gadget... next time!

It's been really rainy today, but even so, since my car doesn't work, Lucas drove me to Office Depot to get another mini-binder and some more mini-paper. Hooray!
` However, they are different from the ones I had been getting at Staples, so, I'll be able to look back upon my notes and say, "Ah, yes, that was when I made the switch from three-hole to seven-hole!"


June 17, 2010:

Jackhammer-noises woke me up in the blinding sunlight of 9:00 in the morning, and they sounded like they were coming from inside the house!
` I went into the living room and saw Troy reading a book on the couch, apparently undisturbed by this. I went out the front door and saw that a flicker was perched above the living room window right above Troy.
` I shooed it away and the bird went winging back to the trees. I came back in and told Troy, who was surprised because he apparently had thought that only a power tool was capable of generating that ungodly-loud of a noise!
` No, indeed, behold the power of the mighty beak!

I was on my way to the locker room at the gym, and who I find Lucas talking to but Anthony, the star canvasser for the window company he trained me to work at, and before that, Lucas also used to work with him!
` Anyway, Anthony had run into me before at the gym and I told him all about Lucas' big acting career. So, today, Lucas and Anthony came to be sitting in the sauna together, and Lucas hardly recognized him because he had lost so much weight.
` They struck up a conversation and Lucas started talking about acting, and Anthony thought he looked like this big actor guy he saw on YouTube that I was talking all about. Lucas asked, "would that actor be me?" Indeed, Anthony didn't recognize him as the same person without a beard!
` Finally, when I came down the stairs and walked past them, Anthony put two and two together and realized that I was the fiance Lucas had also been talking about! He was blown away! Apparently he thought I was really cool and that Lucas does not deserve me!

june 056 Panoramic view

June 21, 2010:

My first day of class! Lucas drived me in his truck! Chuck Jones is my math teacher -- he's a zombie! No, not really. He's really cool because he has us do all the steps of a problem, to help get our brains wrapped around it.

Rick is really hogging Lucas' comptuer. Thankfully Rick gets his computer in the mail soon, because when Lucas came in to check his email, Rick is all like, "I just got home, I just started a short story", only he didn't just get home, and he's in the middle of the short story!
` So, he's on Lucas' computer all the time... as is Troy, but at least Troy gets off when you ask!

OMG, Rick keeps asking me to get the 'password' (encryption code) off my computer so that when his computer comes in the mail, he'll be able to get on the internet... only, I'm pretty sure that's not where to find it.
` I've looked for it, but he says it's no problem, he should be able to hack into the network, never mind the encryption.


June 22, 2010:

Why does Rick have to be such an ass?
` Last month, when we went to the 48-Hour Film Festival and Lucas was a sort of movie star for the first time, Rick had taped up Lucas' truck window, which would have otherwise been dropped down into the door.
` While we did appreciate the near-closedness of the window because we were driving on the interstate in the rain, it would have been nice if Rick had just asked first before doing something like that. It isn't as if Lucas would have said 'no'.
` He also replaced all the light bulbs in Lucas' area of doom, so that when you flip the switch, all the lights turn on, instead of the only one he needs. And then, of course, he's left all those lights on all night, along with leaving the sliding glass door open, presumably.
` Another thing -- he'll do an entire load of wash with only one shirt!

Rrgghghhghggh!

june 065 Rawr! Death to stick!

Rick got his laptop in the mail! Whoo hoo! Now he won't be on Lucas' computer. However, he wasn't able to hack into our network. Duh! If you ask me, it's because he doesn't have the encryption code. If you ask him, however, it's because his kids screwed something up. Whatever!

I looked, and could not find it on my computer, and told him so as he was taking pictures of the view on his cell phone. I was on my way down into the woods with Violet. We ran around and I got my bare feet all muddy, but I also found the handkerchief I had lost months ago! It's icky, but I brought it back home and put it through two loads of wash.
` It doesn't look very clean, but it is better.

After the gym, Lucas and I went to a beach party, which also happened to be the beach party of many high school graduates. I signed Holli's yearbook. I wrote that she had shiny braces and should cherish the time she has with them. Ah, high school memories! I have none, but I wonder if maybe that's a good thing.
` One girl's cousin hit a bear -- here's the picture!

june 077 Her cousin hit a bear!

Srsly. Hey, there goes the train!

june 084 The moon's getting higher

There was this one girl I overheard saying, "What do we do now?" The other said, "Let's go join that group over there!" Like they can't do anything without being in a group?

As the ranger and police were breaking up the celebrations, we recognized the woman cop who we know has been chasing Lacy.
` By the way, did I mention that when Andrew officially broke up with her, which he did a good job of, his tire was flat the next morning? Hmm, suspicious!


June 23, 2010:

I had a hell of a time figuring out what buses to take home, so thank goodness Lucas was there to pick me up!

Finally, I Lucas and I called Comcast and they gave us the router address to find our WepKey, which is the encryption code Rick needed.

Also, I finally remembered that the Mukilteo Farmer's Market is today. Missed it again!


June 27, 2010:

Yesterday, I had the biggest ice cream cone ever, though Lucas helped me eat it. It was especially hard to eat next to the ferry docks, because the algae smells so bad and was leaving a bad taste in my mouth, so I had to get going!

june 103 Arrr! Death to ice cream!

Later on, I was trying to do a million things at once, and Rick needed some other encryption code for the internet. I called Comcast, but then I didn't need them because he finally figured out that he had typed in the number wrong. I knew I should have written it down instead of Lucas!

After an exhausting day, I grew tireder and tireder, and tried to go to bed early. However, it was so warm in our bedroom that the stinky Johnny smell was leaching from the carpet, along with the stinky Lucas smell, so I had to get up and sleep on the couch.
` I awoke this morning at 6:30 to the sound of Lucas knocking on Rick's door because his alarm was going off. After a few minutes, it became clear that Rick wasn't even home, so Lucas went in his room, put one foot on Rick's bed, shut off the alarm... and the bed collapsed!
` Damn.
` It's now after eight in the morning, and I've finally gotten my ass woken up completely. Where the hell is Rick, anyway?


June 28, 2010:

Apparently, Rick left to go to Portland without even telling anyone, as far as anyone could remember. And his bed just happened to be about to break? And his alarm clock just happened to be left on?

Right.

June 29, 2010:

Rick is home again and really pissed about this whole bed-breaking thing, but Lucas says he figures it's a setup, so he won't back down.

Also, I didn't do well on my first math test, but that's only because I missed the first two problems -- and the rest I did well on.


And that's all for June! There's even more amazingly silly stuff going on with Rick as well as a bunch of completely different/ crazy/ exciting stuff in my next installment.
` Here's my June photos, by the way. There's even better photos in there than the ones I showed on this post.
` Be back with July next weekend!

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