The Late Night Double Feature Live Show!

` On Saturday evening, Cheshire Human and I went off to the theatah to watch Riff Raff and friends in The Rocky Horror Picture Show. You could tell it was playing that night because an old guy with tights, a feather boa and a pink wig was standing out front.
` Lucky for us, I had money, so I bought an Audience Participation Kit! And, as expected at such an event, there were many people yelling out the traditional responses to the play in unison. It was a bit eerie.
` Before long, we were engaged in The Time Warp! (That Riff Raff can really scream well when he's singing!)

` The image of those yellow-striped tights going up in the air at the end are still with me....
` And check out Rocky! They re-did his costume, so he now has a blond wig with golden sequin underwear (ones I haven't spanked yet) that he was always admiring in a little mirror.

` ...I was quite impressed at his ability to perform cartwheels while wearing platform sneakers. This part, I believe, was just before Riff Raff blasts everyone with some kind of fun gas gun... then snorts some for himself.
` After being thoroughly drugged, the three innocent newcomers are forced to dress as cabaret or whatever with Frank N Furter and his minions. How do you like his most outlandish showgirl getup?

` Even Dr. Scott is forced by his own logic to dance along in his whore outfit, despite being in a wheelchair.

` Eventually, Riff Raff came along, looking like a bald Space Monkey, with a laser that shoots antimatter... whatever that's supposed to mean. He says: "Say hello to Oblivion!" and the audience says "Hello, Oblivion! How's the wife and kids?"
` And then, Frank N Furter says something about Riff Raff being a disgrace to society or something, and the audience says; "Fuck society!" then Riff Raff says "Exactly!"
` I think that's soooo funny for some sad reason. Here is Frank's last blast to the chest....

` The killing shot to his creature, on the other hand, was to his sequiny ass whereupon he giggled and flopped over.
` All in all, I just about orgasmed over the whole thing. I don't know if that's pathetic, or showing progress for my sexual dysfunction. In any case, I hung out with Riffy the Space Monkey (also known as Michael) for a little while and thanked him for previously getting me into contact with Freaks Like Him.

` I even made the mistake of telling him what didn't really happen last Thursday. He looked less than thrilled. Anyway, he's really awesome.
` After wandering out into the night, Cheshire and I realized that neither of us were tired. So, we decided on a little excursion.
` First of all, we took a lovely trip to Hell. Because, you know, she is a demon and has horns that match Frank N Furter's shoes. It turns out that Hell is famous for its flame flowers. They are lovely to look at, though touching them is not pleasant.

` Next, we left the Judeo-Christian spirit world and into that of the Pacific Northwest Indians. Unfortunately, I had a little run-in with an Orca spirit....

` And yes, that is how the picture came out. My eyes are all-white... and my sexy black pants fit now, too! Thank you, YMCA!
` After stealing enough spiritual energy from such creatures, Cheshire and I had gained enough power to fight the gods themselves! And we beat them! Unfortunately, we wound up getting drunk on the nectar of the gods (and all of that power), and we took out our wrath on the lowly Annoying People of earth.
` Cheshire was extremely adamant about smiting Texas, and she kept shouting obcenities about George Bush.

` It was really embarrassing. Eventually, Buddha and I had to drag her off. Once we'd come to our senses... somehow in the human world again, we were back to our regular mortal capers.
` Cheshire felt like getting drunk some more, and I was hungry, so we went to The Diamond Knot brewery. Unfortunately, just as she was getting out her ID before ordering some nice booze, the waitress noticed that it had expired five months ago and kicked us out!!
` So, we sat ourside for a while... waiting for the pizza I'd ordered.

` Short story long, later on I saw some major breasticles and then came home to an empty apartment. I wondered where Lou was, and then I remembered: He was back at Bubba's Road Monkey Trap!
` It turns out that people liked Lou more than we had thought. We would have known if we'd stayed around and left without paying our bill. (It was an accident, I swear!)
` So, while I was having all kinds of adventures, Lou was involved in many events. At one point, he was surrounded by some musicians who almost got in a fight with him, until Pomegranate burst through and emphatically informed him that Lou was cool. Because he is, now!
` Most ickily, there were several fat and ugly chicks up on the bar with their pants down, having an ass-shaking contest. Oh yeah. Well, there was also a thin black chick with a grill, who had won fair and square. The fattest and ugliest chick, who had pulled her pants down around her ankles, actually kept her pants off after she had lost.
` Horrors!! Almost glad I wasn't there!
` Also of note, Lou had to spend an hour and forty-five minutes talking to Neeko just to get one single point across - that they could do some kind of musical number together. Yes, even though Neeko is all ebonics and stuff and Lou is whitey-white. He sensed much talent in the boy.

` So yeah, Saturday was quite eventful. And today, I happened to run into Weasel - a cracked-out-looking, formerly crazy kid who used to be homeless - and this girl with a Ball Python. Lucky for me, I'd brought along my camera:

` Well, as I need to be up at five tomorrow morning in order to haul my ass to the YMCA, I'd better get going!