Thursday, September 14, 2006

Those darn nail guns...

` Nail guns and cell phones do not mix, and not just for the obvious reasons....

` Short story long: Back when my mommy was here, I'd added another line onto my account for Lou and got a new Sprint phone, free! (Cingular is always cutting his calls off!) Unfortunately, due to a few complications, my apartment number somehow got left out.
` So, I got a postcard in the mail saying that UPS tried to deliver my phone but didn't have my apartment number. (Okay... so, if they didn't have my apartment number, then how did they know which mailbox to deliver it to?) They gave me one day to get to UPS and pick up my package - the eleventh. I was almost there when Lou called me to say that he'd had a little incident with a nail gun and that I was needed to drive him to a hospital. So, I turned around and drove to the apartment.
` A few minutes later he showed up, his knuckle wounded and swollen. Aparently, he had been nailing through a board toward himself, which wasn't a problem until the gun decided to fire two nails at the same instant instead of one. The first nail hit its mark and the second nail was fired diagonally, going through the board and straight into his knuckle bone.
` Ow.
` So, I took him down to the clinic, where his hand continued to swell and become increasingly painful. As proof, I have Crappy Digital Photos (CDPs): Here he is about to get his tetanus shot....

` You can see here on his X-ray that the nail left a puncture wound somewhat between the white dots. Owie.

` So then, he washed his hand really well and they put it in a splint, which was not to be taken off for two weeks.
` ...That was bad because that's his guitar hand and he has a gig in two weeks! Later on, filled to the gills with narcotics and unable to so much as jostle his left hand, Elk Man calls and tells him he has to be at work the next day. Lou was like, "I don't think I can work until the day after next. I mean, the nail broke the bone and I can't use my left hand at all."
` Elk Man became highly irritated and so Lou said; "Well, I'll come in tomorrow anyway and see whether or not I can do much of anything, okay? ...Hello?"
` Elk Man had hung up on him out of irateness.
` Well, he did go to work nonetheless, but not for long. Elk Man, at least, knew enough to keep his mouth shut. And later on, I dragged the very drugged Lou to Seattle Town Hall to be lectured by Michael Shermer. As you may already know.

` About my phone... After hearing from a couple of Sprint reps about my phone being in Kentucky, one said that it was at the warehouse and that they would send another.
` Darn nailguns, always messing up your hands and your efficiency of getting a decent cell phone service.
` Well, yesterday, Lou unwrapped his splint to see what would happen and his hand swelled up again!

` On that day I also hung out with Book Listener and Dandruff (his psoriasis is getting better, so perhaps I shall call him X Dandruff!) until he had to go get pumped full of fun medicine... though later on we got together and had many insane advantures. Disturbing photographic evidence pending.
` This morning, Lou got up and went back to the clinic and got a lovely cast installed on his arm. It's not to be taken off for three weeks!
` Thankfully, his phone magically appeared at the door with a UPS guy! Hooray!! Unfortunately, Lou was still stuck with the dilemma of having a cast while he's supposed to be playing the guitar. ...And then, an idea struck him: Try playing the Dobro on his lap!
` It works! Here he is, playing away, his new cell phone sitting on the chair beside him. So it was a happy ending after all!

` This CDP reminds me, I have to take the garbage out!! ...But it's really cold and wet outside right now. So I haven't. So blah.


Galtron said...

I like happy endings.

Wed-nes-day said...

Does this mean he can't cook?

Bummer. Poor Lou.

Aaron said...


It doesn't seem to me that the cast was necessary. The x-ray image didn't show any broken bones. What are those metallic looking dots though?

I hope he feels better today.

Galtron said...

Realllly, Aaron? What part about a nail punching a hole through a bone isn't breaking it?

Pirate said...

God life was easy when we all used hammers and rolled our own smokes.

S E E Quine said...

` Galtron: You like 'happy endings', eh?

` Wed-nes-day: He can still cook for the most part, although on the first day he went to work he needed me to make him a couple samidges.
` Also I have to tie his boots every morning.

` Aaron: Like Galtron said; a hole in one's bone is a break. Furthermore, since it was exposed to air, he needs antibiotics to make sure he doesn't get a bone infection and lose his finger.
` The top metal dot shows the point of entry... we don't know what the bottom one is.

` Pirate: Arrr, for the days! ...Or at least for one of those 'safety' nail guns that don't double-fire!

Winters said...

Those nailguns are dangerous, and prone to erratic behaviour.

I'm glad to see that no lasting damage was sustained.

It was a pleasure to read another of your posts, Miss Quine. Was this one a "science," a "wackmobile," or a "spurious brainchild?"

S E E Quine said...

` I'm not entirely sure. A Spurious Brainchild, I suppose, as it is a creation by moi, based on my life.
` It may amuse you to know that my blog used to be almost exclusively full of science and wackmobiles, but now I've been putting up largely posts about my own life because my readers tend to find them much more interesting.

` ...I don't know what is more tragic - that people prefer my personal affairs to intellectual-type things, or that I'm a total sellout.

Aaron said...

Geez guys, relax. I didn't mean to imply that the bone was never broken. It's just hard for me to understand where it was broken by looking at the xray. I don't know which bone is broken.

I hope he's doing better now.

S E E Quine said...

` Oh, right. Sorry I was so vague - the injury was just below the first joint of his index finger: On the X-ray, it's that dark scrape-looking-thing going in from the point of entry marker.

` The hand's slowly healing and he's not in much pain anymore. Unfortunately, the withdrawal from the narcotics and the antibiotics having suppressed his immune system has left him very sick, and he's been throwing up, etc.
` I've been taking care of him and buying him special food and whatnot. Right now he's sacked out on the couch, looking so adorable.
` I could kiss him!

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