Sunday, July 23, 2006

At Long Last: Graduation Beach Party Photos!

` This is a new post, but the photos are from June 17th.... Wow, that's... more than a month ago!

` So it was June 17th that I had headed off for Dandruff's graduation party, to the land of totem poles, beach cliffs, and many birds of various reasonable sizes. The other day I saw from my own window a bald eagle being chased by a crow, but at this beach, there are birds everywhere - a golden eagle, crows, terns ('pterodactyl birds'), seagulls and herons.
` Because of the utter Crappiness of my Crappy Digital Camera, I didn't photograph many - though I did get a few pictures of the beach shanty with a quite nifty weather vane belonging to Dandruff's stepdad.

` No, that is not Dandruff's stepdad - he can't be, because he's a.) too closely related and b.) gay. And as for beach cliffs... well, just see for yourself!

` Gee, I'm glad the beach cliffs are solid, especially since earthquakes occur.... The beach itself, however, is more than unstable: You can't walk across it without your feet becoming entirely swallowed up in the sand! (Note my Square Patch.)

` The other beach shanties are quite nice... I especially like that one painted like a stylized sunset:

` By the time Wendizzle and I had 'waded' out near the water, we couldn't keep our feet visible! Here she is looking purposely doofy (and footless):

` Just think about how freaked out the poor clams must be! Anyhow, we then decided to have a 'sinking contest'. Luckily the tide wasn't coming in yet, or I would have been stuck underwater buried up to my thighs!

` ...No, not really. That's what I call 'really obvious trick photography'. After that point, Wendizzle took some pictures of me floundering around in the surf in an Ultra-Conservative Swimsuit (UCS) - my only swimwear at the time - though I later deemed them too uninteresting to allow to take up valuable memory card space.
` And while she was doing this, she accidentally did something that made the size of my Crappy Digital Photos (CDPs) smaller - something I've never done before! That was good, in a way, because then I could take more pictures!
` Now, the next thing I photographed was Mr. Stairdey-Cat (the other half of the above gay guy), who just couldn't bring himself to walk down the neighbor's very scary, tipped-back stairs (the intended staircase is broken).

` After he finally decided to do this... butt-sliding maneuver to get down, I went back to the water and managed to photograph myself looking as hideous and scary as I could in my UCS.

` Grarrr! I be a sea hag! There was another creature of interest as well, one I call 'Dejected Dog', because it slinked around the beach all day, looking as if it had been beaten regularly.

` Eventually, Book Listener came over with her boyfriend... though they didn't stay long because she had a really nasty cold. Poor Book Listener.

` You might be interested to know that at this party there was also... a keg (of root beer) from some brewery, as Adorable Gay Hottie is demonstrating.

` Yes; Adorable, Nymphomaniac and Cute Bisexual Guy appeared at some point. I was through with swimming in cold, salty water (and washing said water off myself), though they waded right in! Observe as they frolick near a buoy and some quite-alert seagulls.

` The seagulls would be more visible if only the pictures were still larger... Meh. Anyway, Nympho was then crowned Seaweed Queen.

` Strangely, she began glowing a pasty white color as she exercised her powers over Adorable and Cute... and me!

` The first thing she did was force us all to sink into the sand! Well, no problem. In fact, Dandruff and Wendizzle were among us, and Dandruff taught us a spiffy game where you lean forward and pretend to ski.

` While we were doing such, I tried to take a picture of the quite-alert seagulls as they flew away from us... unfortunately you can't see them as well as I'd anticipated because the CDP size is too small.

` Same deal when I photographed Adorable wading out towards the ferry boat going in between the islands. You can barely see it.... We did watch the ferry boats a bunch, in fact, we even saw two merge into one, then split apart like an amoeba!

` Here's another photo that could have been bigger - more seagulls flying around.

` ...And yet another - Dandruff's stepfather's shanty is the one with the red roof.

` Then, Adorable began to challenge Nympho's authority, so she unleashed one of her minions on him!

` Eventually, Adorable, Nympho and Cute became distant... literally!

` Hey, guys... come back!

` I would have followed if I wasn't so finished with being wet. Eventually, though, they did return and Nympho and I were somewhat saddened by the fact that we couldn't watch Adorable and Cute as they showered together.
` Oh well....
` Eventually, we all got to sitting around indoors, using Adorable as a footrest while he was distracted with cards....

` At this point, I was considering going around pantsless, because they were quite wet from the waters of the Pacific. I forget who said it, but someone told me to stop touching their hand with my butt.... And when Dandruff's niece, Riley, showed up, I even asked her if she liked my spiffy ultra-conservative underwear (UCU)!
` Why, I don't know. I don't think she's even three yet - although I guess she's plenty old enough to make her own village! VoilĂ ! It's Rileytown!

` As you can see, the sun finally decided to stay with us, and so there was a bit of sunbathing going on. And don't worry, Nympho did not fall onto the beach.

` Eventually, as I recall, Nympho eventually got up to retrieve our good pal Jesus... and they brought party hats! Jesus's partly broken tiara was special, though, because he was the 'Birth[day] Girl'! (In fact, at the beach party earlier today, he was instead the Birth' Girl... he had an apostrophe this time, which he argued was just as exotic as Dead Fetus Guy's name's accent mark.)

` Besides serving as Transportation, Nympho was also the Disc Jockey, and this is a picture of our being on the sun porch, sitting on the jacuzzi etc., singing along to the Chicago soundtrack.

` That Nympho! She's such a hard worker when it comes to social situations - she even offered for us to partake of her 'enjoyment glands', whatever that means....
` I shall never understand why, but this photo of a reflection off the neighbor's window around sunset is stuck to the left side of the post and I can't un-stick it! Stubborn html code....

` Oh well. Anyway, also around that time, who else could show up but my superhero boyfriend, Lou Ryan (in his cute li'l Jimi Hendrix shirt!) to char and devour a slab of dead cow after his second job!

` I think that totem pole behind the shed is warily eyeing Lou's flame crafting abilities.... Later on, we had even more of the same: Several of us went off to collect some driftwood, which wound up burning magnificently.
` So, here we are, standing around the bonfire - that person who looks vaguely Christmas tree-like would be Dandruff, whom I'd avoided photographing before he donned his Makeshift Partial Cloaking Device (MPCD).

` In this picture, after some devouring of lemons, Jesus decided to see what would happen if you were to roast such a fruit. And don't worry, Dandruff is not on fire: He's just... sparkly.

` Unfortunately, the water had it in for us, and began to swiftly crawl up the beach once more after it had already retreated from the last high tide. (Those things are so stubborn!) Though... unlike last time, it continued to climb past the point it had previously gotten to and began smashing up Riley's village!
` After it had finished laying waste to Rileytown, it began threatening the bonfire.... Luckily, Dandruff had managed to seek refuge on a large piece of firewood as the water pulled itself right up to the fire pit. Oh no!! Don't just stand there, Lou! Do something!

` ...But there was nothing he could do - the sea had already won! Not even his amazing fire-lighting skills were of any use... I guess it's pretty straightforward - you just can't have a bonfire in the ocean.

` On down the beach a few shanties along, however, someone else was being much more crafty with their bonfire - they had theirs on a little hill of sand and were constructing a wall!
` This battle of the elements went on until 9:27, when Nature had successfully taken the fort under siege:

` Oh well... those people were happy enough about having the fire going so long. In fact, that was when they began to shoot off fireworks - and I'm surprised that my camera allowed me to take a CDP at just the right moment!

` Pretty.... Then, as it became even darker, we all sat around on the porch, talking about this, that, and the other thing - and if you look closely, you can see the city of Everett in the background!

` That girl, by the way, would be Flinch. I forget when she arrived, though.... Soon enough - after Everett had become even more visible - Lou got out his guitar and began his patented Lou Ryan musical extravaganza. (Notice the frightened, caged lemons in the background.)

` Eventually, almost everyone wound up listening to Lou from the safety of the great indoors while giving each other tarot card readings or some such nonsense. That didn't bother Lou... he just sat out on the wall, playing to the ocean water....

` ...which was pounding at the wall beneath his feet! Boy, that was some angry surf - it was challenging us to come back down there and get in, although we all wound up leaving without giving it a second glance.
` Lou left before me, as he requires getting up early for work, while I stayed just long enough to be bitten by Cute Bisexual Guy.

` As I've said, this was my first beach party. As I've since had a second one, you can read about that adventure (it involves me being attacked by crustaceans) if you aren't already tired of this one. Of course, I intend to have others. Until then... Nanoo Nanoo!


Galtron said...

Ha ha haaa! I want one of those Makeshift Partial Cloaking Devices!! Did Dr. Nociceptor invent them or something?

And I'm glad you like being bitten by some things on beaches.

Giant Sand Fleas........ yech!

Anonymous said...

You lead the WIERRRRDEST life ever on the fact of the earth o yeah I wish my life was like thaaaat.

Cherrie said...

Now that was quite a party . . . at least in terms of the cast of characters. Reminds me of some of the theater groups I've belonged to.

How did the combination of Nymphomaniac and Cute Bisexual Guy keep from combusting? Too much water? Or did you just break off the story before that happened?

Inquiring minds want to know . . .

S E E Quine said...

` Galtron: I believe she did.

` Anonymous: Good to know.

` Cherrie: Yeah, I think my friends are a theater group. Unfortunately I don't think there was any sex at that party.... I don't think Cute was really into her, anyway.

MissDaisyBiddle said...

I wish you a real beach party next time. This one looked like a mud party. ANd how far out did you have to wade before you could swim. Did anyone swim . . . in the mud ?
I've been enjoying your blogs. They make me want to get to mine. I tend to ignore it and just journal. I admire that you just do it.
Do it,

S E E Quine said...

` Oh, pish and pishaw! Of course we were swimming... when the tide came in! And besides, I've had a 'next' party since then, and there was even more swimming... plus, in the water we met some new friends that liked to bite us!
` I'm glad you've pulled yourself out of the mud! ;) So have I! Keep it up!

Aaron said...

Did Jesus start that fire spontaneously?

S E E Quine said...

` I'm not sure, but I think I did see him walk on water at some point.... I just didn't have my CDC with me at the time.

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