Gone to Mexico, be back Jan 21! But first, some fun goodies!
` At long last, I am finally displaying my FabCam photos of many things including (but not limited to) octopi with green peppers, Lou in his Slithering Slug Form, and even Almost-Boobies! All for you!! (Not to mention, I have another sciency post below....)
` Be amazed at the megapixelage, for it is mighty! These photos are so high-quality that you can click (I suggest right-clicking) on most of them to see a larger view, and then if you click again (with the little magnifying glass thingy), you'll get a full-size view!
` Fittingly, first up is my very first FabCam photo - myself on Cephalopodmas morning! You might recognize the full-resolution bits of it from my earlier showdown....
` And I really can't forget to show the wonderful man who bought me the FabCam....
` O' course, he couldn'ta done it if it weren't for his mom, 'cause then he wouldn'ta been here in the first place!
` I guess that's kind of a weird expression - she's actually listening intently to B-dizzle, who would be this fast-moving bloke....
` Damn. He's still blurry when he raps.... Speaking of B-dizzle, I bought him a really nice sketchbook for Belatedmas, and even made him a personalized title page!
` The white disc-shaped thing is meant to be a weight, though I left it blank so that he could write his name/logo in it.
` So, what all did I photograph? Well, I'd hazard a guess that the next photo is the sunset at the end of Cephalopodmas....
` If you clicky, you can even see the birds clearly! And the next day... isn't that just beeeeautiful? (A chunk of that is another one of my 'showdown' demonstrations.)
` Finally, the day came when we had to bring Lou's mom back to the airport.... Well, because it was dark, it was hard not to get a blurry photo, though I tried....
` In case you didn't know, the Seahawks stadium is red and green at holidaytime.
` Well, stationary objects kept winding up being blurry, so I tried photographing moving objects for a change. I don't think this one was too bad....
` This next one is from one of the tunnels, except that I allowed Microsoft Photo Editor to do an 'AutoBalance' on the color levels. Since it was a night photo, it really screwed up, though I decided it looked kinda cool.
` ...As for the showdown 'mystery shirt'? You're gonna love this - it's TallGuy looking as goofy as possible while we were at Crapplebee's the day after Christmas! How adorkable!!
` His brother - who was so mutated that Cheshire could hardly believe they were related - and his awesome friend Ross were there as well, both with fake tattoo sleeves. I would have taken more pictures, but my camera decided that it had used enough battery juice and kept turning itself off.
` I did, however, buy more batteries in time for New Year's. Unfortunately, when everyone's fireworks were really at their height, I had my camera on the wrong setting and it wouldn't focus on any of them! They were so out of focus that they barely showed up in the viewfinder! Sadly, this was the best I could do:
` Arrrgh! It almost looks like a false-color infected cell! Only later did I realize the camera was set on the close-up setting. Mega-Echoing "D'oh!"!
` Then, probably the next morning, I realized the full zoom potential of the camera by taking this picture. Click on it and then magnify it to see the full size version!!
` Fick!! It's whonkin' huge! You can even make out the trees! Minutes later, after becoming temporarily preoccupied with mildew, I took another photo out the window and you can see the houses and everything! Holy smokes!!
` That day, I think it was, we were being really sluggish and Lou was asleep on the couch a lot. We were finally going to go do something, though, being exceedingly slug-like, he was slow to rouse.
` However, I thought I'd take this opportunity to show you the manner in which the Lou Ryan slides off the couch and onto the floor, appearing to be asleep except for the fact that it is moving with the rythmic, muscular action of its feet.
` After a few minutes of this slugging along, the gastropod-like creature then slides itself further along the floor until there is enough room to stand upright. Only then does it regain its human form.
` Isn't that just precious? And then... on January 3, my first day of school on which I failed my math test, I went to Denny's with both Cheshire...
` And Roman Jesus! He had just got back from Albequerque, New Mexico where he had been surrounded by crazy people while working on a political campaign.
` I remember that he told us we made him feel like he was back in Albequerque! Now, back to this failing my first math test; I couldn't do 400 simple arithmetic problems in 20 minutes so I needed to work on automatizing those skills:
` Dog bless, Lou, he had taken me to Borders and Toys'R'Us where we found these flash cards.... And here's Cheshire flashing me!! Whoaaaaa!
` And now I'm laughing because I remember she had said; "Why do they use that weird squiggly sign instead of a plus or minus sign?" When Jesus and I said; "Because it's division", she about exploded into a million bits of "how could I be that retarded?"-ness and promptly began drawing women with large boobs (though I'm not sure why):
` My only huge regret, however, is that the next day when Cute Bi, X-Dan, Flinch and Cheshire all went to Castle (I was driving), and I didn't bring my camera. See, that wouldn't have normally been any bummer at all... except for when we came in, all the queens were dressed as nuns and singing My God (parody of My Girl) from Sister Act!
` Yes, it was Sister Act night, the movie was playing, they were singing along to the songs, and the fat one made a surprisingly nice Whoopie Goldberg! (I'm surprised X-Dan didn't mention this, though I brought it up in his comments.)
` I'm serious!! They were all so cute and nun-like, and singing together (I remember one held the cross upside-down with the word 'Jesus' because his Catholic relatives rejected him or something like that) and it was so cool!
` *Sigh*. Other than that, the only thing I remember while I was there (despite the fact that I wasn't drunk) was hearing an odd phrase uttered by Cheshire to Flinch: "It's not my job to take your fruit." Of course, the girl had merely misplaced it out of drunkenness. All I can say is, during the car ride back, Flinch was very... let's say, indecisive, entertaining and disturbing to all of us.
` ...And judging from her comments about Lou, we should have seduced her when we had the chance!
` Oh well. At least I did think to bring my camera to that Chinese buffet when I went there with TallGuy once more. Remember the blobs I'd insisted were really a lovely Whole Octopus Stir-Fry near the bottom of this post? See, I'm not making it up!
` Here's the pure cephalopod-a-liciousness at 25% its original resolution:
` Oh, and I also have some very irritating news: Last night I left my car at a Mechanic Shop That Shall Remain Nameless, Though it Rhymes Eerily With 'Disadvantage'. There was much to do today with getting a huge bill on car repairs that didn't need to be done, and the labor alone was three hundred and twenty dollars!
` Whaaaaa? How I ever agreed to that, don't ask - I was in a mad dash to the post office to mail something and my Ritalin had worn off.
` Lou and I could have taken the car if the police had been there - as I hadn't signed a work order - but they did not show up despite our many efforts to call them.
` Damn.
` In the end, I was charged a 'bargain' of $540 out of about $250 that would normally be charged at most mechanic shops. I think.
` Oh well... at least I was so stressed that I came away from it with something - this huge cyst of a pimple:
` Egads! "She cannae take it anymorre, Capt'n! She's gonna blow!" On the brighter side, did I mention it was snowing this morning? Nice, huh?
` Yeah, the sidewalk was really icy today as I walked down it. Oh, and here's another "Holy Fick" shot of the mountain from today:
` Once again, the trees are quite visible. Oh! And I almost forgot about my little present for Dan, Galtron, G-Man, Gareth, and anyone else who cares....
` Ooooh yeah, baby! Click on that one!! Dish-washing at my house is sure to r0xx0r your b0xx0rz! Unless you're X-Dan, in which case you'll probably think of it as rather amusing. I hope.
` Thanks for the patience required for this long post, boys! I've got to get some rest, now for the big trip tomorrow! (Gee, I hope I passed my third math test today, despite freaking out and really messing up a lot because I forgot my Ritalin!)
11 comments:
S E E, your photos are always so much fun -- and the captions are hilarious!
Er ... did I ever tell you that I have this abnormal compunction to help people wash their dishes? Yeah. No kidding. I just love to lend people a helping hand with that.
Have a great time off!
Squeeky clean! You are a beautiful woman, dishwashing or not..Thanks
Don't forget to write!
` Really, Dan! Well, if you're ever way over on my side of the country, or if I'm on yours, we could do dishes together!
` Also, glad my captions meet your funniness approval - I don't get much feedback from people about that.
` G-man, awwww! And hey, I wouldn't mind washing your dishes!
<<
>>
:\
` Well, I'm off! I'll do my best to stay in touch (and check my e-mail) while I'm gone!
` Byyyeeeee!
Whooweeeee such an awesome post. I can tell you put a lot of work into this one and I appreciate it because I have done many posts like this - I mean who can forget the picture posts I do with 70 pictures in them lol.
That camera's resolution is mighty I tell ya, absolutely mighty. Lou did well with that gift fo sho!
The pics with the snow capped mountains are amazing. Me likey pics like that. Now I'm picturing a different kind of pic - your boobs as mountains and maybe ice-cream for the snow :P
I love your cheeky little smile in the last pic you naughty girl ;)
"Fick!! It's whonkin' huge!" ..... yeah I get that all the time :D
LMAO!!! Lou as a slug creature!!! I love it!
So good to see your almost-boobies as well!
Those photos are tremendously mightily detailed: the trees and houses in the distance! The whiteheads! The octopus suckers!
Too bad you didn't photograph the drag nuns -- then you could see the stubble! :D Perhaps there will be others...
Have fun on your trip for me while I stay up here keeping the snow company!
Oh yeah, and nice drawing of the gangsta!
Spoony! That last photo is NAUGHTY!
` Got to California last night. I've been talking on the phone with people, walking all over the neighborhood (feels good after driving 20 miles) and watching home movies of Lou Ryan.
` In one of them, a fourteen-year-old Lou is on a cruise ship, lip-synching to 'Great Balls of Fire', using both his hands and feet on the piano.
` It was very disturbing, and at the end, the announcer asked the audience to indicate their approval by level of applause: "Is he the biggest nutcase you've seen?" The crowd went wild.
` Gareth, perhaps join me for a threesome with some ice cream?
` Thanks, Galtron! I will indeed have plenty of funness (and perhaps more nakedness) for everyone upon my return.
` Aaron, do you think that's more of a good thing or a bad thing, or are you just stunned?
` Incidentally, since my mom's boyfriend is into putting naughty pictures on his desktop background, that one was among them... luckily it came down about 24 hours later.
` Well, now I'm off to play with remote-control cars! Byeee!
Have fun! Don't get like THIS in Mexico!!!
So, about that more nakedness business, have you gone skinny dipping in the ocean yet? Seen any sting rays? Been attacked by ferocious corals?
PS, that thing with your mom's boyfriend is just... wrong.
hope you enjoyed mexico and your vacation. I'm L.A. right now and it almost seems cold. and for some reason I keep thinking I should be doing the dishes ?
` Ugh... I've forgotten about this post. Even so I shall respond like nothing has happened.
` Thankfully, I did not wind up passed out on a picnic table. Thanks for your concern, Cassie!
` Galtron, yes it is. Just wrong. I have not, however, seen any sting rays or ferocious corals.
` Kelp, on the other hand....
` Can I help you with those dishes, Denny?
` I noticed it was slightly less than warm in L.A. Bizarre. I was going to heat myself up by attacking Bill 'Chrissy' Mumy and Robert Haimer Fishedowitz.
` You don't want to know.
Post a Comment