Wednesday, February 22, 2006

TGFZ!

` There is absolutely no way to log onto the internet at the library for more than an hour a day, even if no other internet stations are occupied! Even so, it is rare that I can get on the internet there for more than fifteen minutes because I don't much feel like waiting until there is less of a crowd; I've got things to do!
` Hence, no Science and/or Wackmobile posts until I can get online on my own!

` Thank Goodness For Zippy's - it's pretty close! You see, this is a picture of me (before I got my hair cut), standing near my apartment on a chilly, windy day...


` Notice the tall 'masts' of the Everett Event Center, which is just down the street from my destination:


` You may recognize the interior from my Random, Unrelated Sketches. The logo on the window, which can be seen near the bottom of this post, is meant to be Zippy, whom I saw last night before the swing-dancing lesson held there. (I'm getting pretty good at it, too!)

` So... what kinds of excitement has befallen me lately? Well, I was actually able to drive my own car this weekend!
` (That would be the Chevrolet Burgundy Rectangle by that house in Ohio....)
` EdgeWalker, who has been using my Rectangle to get to and from work for about six months now, is going to need to stop driving my car. Lack of oil/transmission fluid changes has resulted in some pretty gnarly little problems that are only going to get worse with use.
` The car needs to be either sold or repaired, depending on which is more worth it. As for me, I do sometimes need to use it to get it around town. For example, on Friday I walked fifteen blocks to the laundromat with way too much laundry to carry - especially with my crappy laundry basket! (I should have taken the nicer one - which I had bought for both Phil and I.)
` Thankfully, a very nice superhero/rockstar was there to assist me on my trip, though I had to take the bus home. It... was... so... heavy!

` Sore and exhausted, I called EdgeWalker and demanded my car back for the weekend. Unable to find my house, I had to guide him to the backyard (our 'parking lot') via cell phone. Unfortunately, he was apparently not able to find the backyard and began walking home before calling me to tell me he'd parked it on the street, thinking I wasn't home.
` I really should have moved the car, as a lot of vandalism occurs on that street, but I decided to be lazy and make dinner, take a shower and go to bed.
` The next morning, I woke up to find my car the victim of a drive-by egging. I photographed this spectacle, though there is no way to put any more photos on the internet without my own functioning computer and internet service.
` Then, because EdgeWalker had not taken my car to the shop like he was supposed to, I drove it over to Jiffy Lube - which charges about twice as much as regular garages (which aren't open on weekends!) - and spent $220 on getting my filthy oil and transmission fluid changed, as well as a couple of other things that needed to be done.
` My engine and transmission were so nasty! The car is still not working that great, and will probably require several hundred dollars or more to get working properly, if at all possible.

` What else did I do Saturday? Oh yes, I had completed the comic for the superhero/rockstar's flyer - which he has just shown me, compiled and Xeroxed. Looks good! In fact, I did the lettering just this morning. (Which reminds me... LIVE! The Lou Ryan Band / March 10 @ 7 - 9 / At Zippy's Java Lounge!)
` In our comic, Lou Ryan is rocking out onstage when he detects the presence of the Bonda corporation's subliminal advertements for giant, gas-guzzling SUVs. He tells the audience he needs to take a break and flies to Bonda Headquarters where he is confronted by Sledgehorn Darkmath, his cowering lackey, and a small army of Bonda robots. (Can Lou Ryan save the day? / Find out March 10!)
` Oh, I'd love to put up at least the first part, but there is no way for me to do that right now unless I beg EdgeWalker to let me borrow his camera, computer and internet service for a little while.
` As I was saying, since Mr. Ryan had somehow left his newly-repaired guitar here at Zippy's, I did some shopping at a store I can't walk to, grabbed the guitar, cooked myself some dinner, and went over to his place.
` Lou really liked the comic. In fact, he really likes me, too! It wasn't long before I was tied up upon my request... and blindfolded because there was light in my eyes. However, as he has just as much luck relieving my constant sexual tension as I do, I merely became extremely ticklish and wound up more or less frustrated as usual.
` If you haven't already guessed, this would explain what was going on here. That was the day I met this strange and talented hornball and determined that he was not some crazy freak wanting into my pants.
` ...No, indeed, he is a relatively normal freak wanting into my pants.

` Let's just say that on that fateful day, we had hastily taped up my 'curtain' about an inch too high, and... well, I think that Phil, moving a bit too close to my window, got a glimpse of the fact that Mr. Ryan is a natural redhead.
` Shocking? I know that all my friends etc. read this blog - but most of them probably did not know that I am a perpetually horny pervert who really needs help. Why is this? Let's see... I've never been satisfied in the relevent manner, as it tends to be Extremely Tricky... the rest should intuitively follow.
` In fact, my uncontrollable sexual thoughts are so pervasive that I frequently must drop what I am doing and break down, practically crying. This constant mental torture has actually earned me the nickname of 'Virgin Sex Goddess' among some of my friends. And so, logically, I have been seeking help for my condition, in the form of delicious men.

` The very horny and very tasty Lou Ryan is the only one so far, as I'm trying to keep things simple. Still Technically a Virgin, I am less of a Sex Goddess as I am becoming extremely jaded to the prospect of physical fun.

` Damn to the misery... and the conversion disorder! I feel as physically numb as a doornail. Or whatever. Sadly, my psychologist doesn't know what to do about it.

` Gar.

` So, what else happened this weekend? Well, I woke up in Lou's bed on Sunday morning and drove him to his temporary job - as he won't have the money to have his car repaired until he's worked sufficiently long at his new, better-paying job.
` Then, I headed home to call some more of my friends, buy a mop to clean the exploded blueberry spill residue off of the kitchen floor, and to prepare some surprisingly sweet pepper chili with spicy Textured Vegetable Protein in place of meat. (Better than it sounds!)
` As Lou didn't work long on Sunday, we had time to run a few errands (with the help of my car!), including hauling a free table and chairs to his place in lieu of studio furniture.
` But now... EdgeWalker is still in physical possession of my car - which is now threatening to stall - so I'm back to riding the bus for 75 cents a pop every time my legs turn to rubber. Of course, Lou would fly us around town, but that would draw too much attention.
` ...Though, he does sometimes employ some very nifty rollerblades.

` Anyway, I'm glad that carrying a filing cabinet for eight blocks is out of the way, though at least I won't have to carry a second-hand dresser home if I buy one tomorrow: I'm getting my car on Thursday so that I can get to a very important dental appointment. (I have been nursing a broken tooth for ever!)
` Perhaps, I'll even take it into a shop if they'll squeeze me in for a look-see!

` So, that's been my life as of late. Nothing that terribly exciting, but I figured my bloggy friends would be interested to hear how things are going since I don't have much internet time.
` In fact, said internet time is About Up! But fear not! I'll be back someday, bloggy friends!

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maybe you could charge EdgeWalker with an hour of time on his computer for each day he has your car!

And... be careful with your new pervert! You know what they say about superhero/rock stars!

Anonymous said...

Also - and I'm speaking for all your loyal readers - we would really, really like to see your new comic! Perhaps EdgeWalker would also see fit to allow you to use his NDC (Nice Digital Camera)?

Aaron said...

I want to see the photo of the offending egg!

Yes Spoony, I second the notion that we'd like to see your new comic.

locomocos said...

i want to see the natual redhead!!!

congrats on your new toy!

keep it simple, sure. but be sure to let us know when 'technically' becomes 'not at all'!!!

hee hee hee! i'm so excited for you!!!!

Chriswab said...

Hey you make photos. Cool. See ya

Spoony Quine said...

` Yessirree! He is as delicious as he is freckly.

` And, though I have relinquished the car at last, I may yet work out a deal with EdgeWalker and/or Phil for displaying my photos and comics online!

Anonymous said...

Hey,
Got your message when I got home Sunday. YES! You got your wheels back.....I'm decidedly proud of you girlfriend.
You betcha'
Do keep me posted, I worry about you....
Hugs

Spoony Quine said...

` Yes and I didn't even have to report it stolen! ...BTW I didn't even have time to correct my last comment. (This is the very next chance I've had to be online!)
` Of course I had meant that EdgeWalker had relinquished my car. Haaaa!
` And you are right, Laura. Perhaps I should just bug someone else to use their computer if I can't get what I need from the library and don't feel like spending a lot.
` Which I can't. So... who to bug? Man, here at the library you can't even cut and paste! You have to copy html code via typing and everything!
` Also, there's no opening another tab because all they have is Internet Explorer and in order to display two pages at once you have to start the program running in another window!

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Microsoft owns your library's internet?

Spoony Quine said...

` I would think that if it weren't for the fact that no one seems to be able to access their Hotmail accounts from here.

Anonymous said...

I smell a conspiracy!

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